Faith

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Wait for the LORD and keep his way,
and he will exalt you to inherit the land; (Psalm 37:34 ESV)

For thirty years I worked in acquisition and finance for the US Army. I loved every job I did and Monday was not a bad word. Every job had its special requirements and they all had deadlines attached to some form of end product. It may have been a budget for Congress or delivery of items to Army units. I always prided myself on beating every deadline. When asked what my strength was I always said that I met every deadline. When asked what my weakness was I always said that I met every deadline.

The thrill of working came from starting something new or creating order out of chaos. To meet all those deadlines, and produce the needed result, many people experienced unpleasant demands from me. I never allowed anyone to get between me and my deadline. Some people liked my performance because they knew the job would get done. More people, however, did not like my performance because I made their life miserable. My thrill of achievement came at the their expense of despair because they had to work with me. I was not the tip of the spear. I was the butt end of the spear. I watched other leaders use a team-building or encouraging method. I didn’t have time for nice, I only had time for getting the job done.

I’m retired now, and often look back at my performance. These moments of reflection have turned my heart on my once hard driving efforts to achieve every goal. My life today is mostly free of deadlines, and I must admit that I like it that way. I enjoy the opportunity to watch my grandson grow. I love my church and the ministry opportunities that allow me to get involved in other people’s lives.

My recent ministry work involves preparing to send a medical missionary team to Honduras. I have no medical training but I get to use my skills of organizing, coordinating and keeping the team informed of what needs to be done by a certain date. As the day of departure gets closer, I catch myself becoming anxious and worrying about payments, schedules, lodging and a host of other details. Today, as I updated my spreadsheets, I again caught myself getting anxious and starting to worry. Our group communicates through a Facebook page. I checked the page for recent postings and was brought to a halt when I read what our co-leader had posted just a few minutes before I opened the page. Earlier in the morning she was doing her daily devotion and bible study. She was looking for something elaborate or profound that would really excite the team. After looking for something profound, she returned to a simple verse that applied to our trip. She wrote: “He will supply just what we need & just when we need it. The verses before this one is when Paul is thanking the Phillipian church for helping him & sending supplies. Even though they couldn't send much, they did what they could & his (& our) God supplied their needs.” At that moment all of my worry and anxiety went away.

That’s how God works, He keeps it simple. When I worry or get anxious I start looking for something complicated or profound. Sometimes I don’t look and just sit there and worry. That morning, her simple words brought me back to knowing that God will provide all we need. He will be with us every minute of the trip. I may get busy, slip back into anxiety but I only need to remember her posting on Facebook. She reminded me that this trip is all about God. All we will do is for Him. It’s not for us to be anxious or worry. That will add no benefit or make anything happen. I just need to be obedient to His calling, and will, through the entire trip. I’m not being obedient if I worry or get filled with anxiety. I just need to be there and do my part of helping others. When we return from our trip, my prayer is that no one will remember me, but they will remember that God is always there for everyone.

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