Poetry

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What a conniving creature
Is the preying TV preacher
Spinning spider webs to ensnare
Seekers of Jesus everywhere
He pulls the wool over blinded eyes
He twists the truth into lucrative lies.

His road to hell is paved with gold
Chauffered by satan he rides in a Rolls
Just like Judas he pilfers silver
His wordy witchcraft has made him richer
How wickedly this wizard snickers
As souls to satan he delivers.

Oh, deliver your soul from his net
He's after all the loot he can get
The preacher promises donors will prosper
But buy his words and you'll get clobbered
You'll wonder why the heavens are brass
While you plead with God these words to bless:

I am a king, I know no need
To harvest blessings I plant a seed
By faith I give what I need to live
To God's replacement in the pulpit
My words have power to create
God must obey my magic faith
My empty wallet, I'll simply call it
A basket to gather a big green harvest.

By faith I vow and now God’s bound
To make me the wealthiest fool in town
By faith I'll borrow, be blessed tomorrow
I’ll sell my blood, take out more loans
So the guy up front can enjoy the best
By faith I follow my heart not my head
My credit card I consecrate
To the god up front who teaches me faith.

I went into debt to get god some bread
I must do everything that “little god” said
The seed for my need will help me receive
He makes me believe in dreams I can’t see
I’ll have my harvest when my hardship is hardest
But now I must feather that vulture’s nest.

They'll rob you blind and mess with your head
They fleece the flock in their shearing shed
They fatten themselves for the fires of hell
Lies they tell to steal your wealth
They've taken your tithe, they want the rest
They're plucked up by the roots, twice dead.

You cannot bind God by your own works
Presumptuous promises don't honor His Word
A pimping preacher is an antichrist
Demanding his due till the day you die
Stay away from those whores today
All they will bring is heartache and pain
They disgrace Christ’s name and cause a complaint:

Oh, those preying TV preachers
Who milk the mail for cash
Blood-sucking Bible teachers
Who blow funds on a beer bash
After pitching your prayers in the trash.

Plant a seed for prosperity
I see a Rolex out there
So hurry to my meet my needs
Just open your wallet and share.

Golden swans in my shower stalls
A trip to the Holy Land
Costly paintings on my walls
Nothing’s too grand for God’s man.

Adorn my fingers with diamond rings
No off-the-rack suits for me!
Pay your taxes to the king
Give, or you won’t receive!
The Bible says sow liberally
Blessings don’t come for free!

A vow of two thousand dollars
That’s God’s rock-bottom price
He’d rather not be bothered
With a measly ten or a five!

Send in that vow right now
Or the Lord will pass you by
Don’t stop praying (and paying)
Or the Fountain will run dry
And you’ll never get pie-in-the-sky!

Send me your wedding ring
I’ll take ANYTHING!
I’ll even take the food from your mouth
To help you prove your faith with a vow!

The more you pour in my offering plate
The more the Lord will change your fate
The modern church is a market place
If you hesitate it’ll be too late.

This is YOUR day for a miracle
Money makes you more spiritual
This precious truth is worth more than gold
I’ve gotten rich off the lies I’ve told
And all the CD’s and books I’ve sold
To stupid fools in the pews like you
Who don’t even read 2 Peter 2.

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