Prayers
And what
profit
do we get
if we
pray
to Him?
[Job 21:15]
*************************
"I've wanted to
PRAY,
for somebody,
Lord......."
[SOLEMN NOD.]
"Go on,
My child.
Pray.
I
am
listening."
(Irritable squirm!)
"Well....
DON'T RUSH ME!"
[THE FATHER TURNS
HIS RIGHT,
TO JESUS.]
"Nu?"*
[GENTLE CHUCKLE.]
[TURN BACK.]
[PATIENT SIGH.]
"Go on,
My beloved."
"Well......."
(Chomp on a mini-bagel**.)
"What's STOPPING
me is.........."
[CURIOUS FROWN.]
"What is stopping
you,
Mein kin'der?"
(Chomp.)
"Well........
the whole problem is...."
[TURN AGAIN, TO
THE RIGHT,
TO
JESUS.]
[NODDING.]
[VERY JEWISH ACCENT.]
"Nu?
There's a ...PROBLEM?"
[GENTLE CHUCKLE.]
"Father.....!"
(Irritable chomp.)
(Look up at ceiling.)
"Are YOU LISTENING
TO ME?"
[NOD.]
[SMILE!]
"Yes,
My beloved.
Go on."
[GLANCE,
FULL OF MIRTH,
AT JESUS.]
"ANYWAY!"
(Small glare up at ceiling.)
"AS I WAS SAYING....."
(Mouth full of mini-bagel.)
"I don't know if it'll
be a WASTE 'a TIME,
or NOT?"
"And,
why would
that be,
O,
My kin'der?"
(Slow chomp.)
"CUZ!
My PRAYER-TURNOVER,
IS SO BAD!"
[PATIENT SIGH.]
[GENTLE SMILE!]
"Well.........
it IS,
LORD!"
[NOD.]
"Turnover:
isn't that some
sort of pastry,
My precious."
(Nod, congenially,
up at the ceiling.)
"Yeah, Lord!
You're RIGHT!
I guess,
You guys didn't have
turnovers,
in Your DAY.
They're sort'a
like POPTARTS:
only,
you put them in
the OVEN."
[SMILE!]
"Ah.
I see."
"Yeah;
they're really good:
especially, the ones
that come out of that
Pillsbury Dough roll.
They make your MOUTH,
water, LORD!
Especially, after ya squirt
that GOOEY WHITE STUFF,
all over it!"
[SOLEMN NOD.]
"I can imagine,
My most precious.
Go on."
"Well.........anyway;
being that my prayer-turnover
is so poor..............."
[CHUCKLE!]
"Have these,
replaced your
first love:
the blueberry
poptart,
My beloved?"
"NO!
NO!"
(Glare up at ceiling.)
(Hands on hips. )
"You ain't LISTENING
TO ME!"
[WIPING TEARS OF LAUGHTER
FROM EYES.]
"Go on,
My precious."
"LISTEN!
I'M SERIOUS!
My PRAYER-TURNOVER IS
BAD!
BAD!
BAD!"
[PATIENT NOD.]
[MORE NODDING.]
"So......
WHY SHOULD I PRAY,
for SOMEBODY ELSE?"
(Squint up at ceiling.)
"Ya see,
what I MEAN?"
[VERY SOLEMN NOD.]
"I understand."
"YEAH!
Why would somebody
ELSE,
want ME.....
to PRAY,
for THEM?"
(Take another mini-bagel.)
(Chomp.)
"WHEN....my OWN
prayer-BATTING-AVERAGE,
is so...........
POOR?"
[FATHER TURNS TO
GLANCE, ONCE MORE,
TO HIS RIGHT.]
[GENTLE CHUCKLE.]
[PATIENT VOICE.]
"I'm not,
a Baseball Game,
My beloved."
"YEAH!
You ARE!
You're......
the PHILLIES!"
[TURN TO LOOK TO
HIS RIGHT.]
[GENTLE BURST OF LAUGHTER!]
"YEAH!
YOU ARE!
YOU ARE,
LORD!
YOU'RE the... PHILLIES!"
"Perhaps,
My beloved."
(Lots of chomping.)
(Furious nodding at the
ceiling fan.)
(Mouth full of dough.)
"SEE?
YA ARE!"
"But,
even the Phillies,
My child,
win
sometimes."
***********************
And,
My servant
Job
shall pray
for you.
[Job 42:8]
________________
*Yiddish:
'Can you believe this?'
**They're delicious.
You have to look down,
on the last shelf,
at the grocery store;
they're
under the regular bagels.
______________________
In memory:
Dad, a Phillies fan.
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