The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/07/09
Very powerful message here! Your imagery in the beginning was vivid and message profound. Great writing!
11/10/09
I have been to Hawaii, and your imagery captured it! I do believe that this could be a very real story.
I don't know if this is true but it surely grabbed my attention as I kept reading to know what happened next. Very intense situation described well. Believeable setting and characters. Good job.
A great testimony that we should never underestimate the power of the Name of Jesus, spoken in faith. I really liked this entry.
11/11/09
Oh, I hope this is a true story! Marvelously told!

Because of the way you arranged the first sentence of the third paragraph, it sounds as if the tourists are the ones preying on the vulnerable.

Great job with the buildup of suspense--really good story.