The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/28/09
You third paragraph is outstanding!

This is moody and well-written. Superb example of a slice-of-life.
06/03/09
This is good solid substantial and varied writing. Thanks for showing us your talent.

Colin
Your words are so fluid and poetic! Very rhythmic flowing piece with great deascriptions. I felt like I was watching the M.C.in the same room. Well done!I like this alot.
06/03/09
I could feel the heaviness and despondency in that room where the MC worked. You have the ability to bring what you're describing to life, such strong imagery.
Poor Adrian, going through a full day without sun and the outdoors. I know people live like your very accurate descriptions, but I thank God I'm not one of them. Well written.
06/03/09
I like this! There is such "atmosphere"in your excellent descriptions, attention to detail, and careful characterization of your MC. I felt I had a front-row seat as I watched his day unfold. Great writing! :)
06/04/09
This was oh-so-rich in atmosphere...I felt the strain of the MC's workload and exhaustion. Excellent stuff.