The Official Writing Challenge
BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN
INSTRUCTIONS
how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level
ENTRIES
submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners
Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.


TRUST JESUS TODAY

  • Share
  • how it works
  • Submit
Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Fruit (10/10/05)
Crisp and cool it looked up there
There in the tree.
Treetop fruit forbidden
Forbidden for you and me.

Yet the serpent deceived me, and so I ate
Ate of its wondrous flesh.
Flesh of ripe red and green.
Green like the leaves.

Leaves…leaving, now we must go.
Go far away.
Away to another land because of what I have done.
Done it is, and I this I regret.

My regret for eating the fruit is very deep,
Deeper than the oceans blue.
Blue, yes. For I disappointed my Lord God
The God who has cared for us well.

Well, I shouldn’t have eaten it.
It was wrong, forgive me God
God help us on our journey.
As we journey outside of the garden we loved.

Loved by God were we,
But we blew it.
It was paradise.
Paradise pristine…The best fruit we have ever seen.

We have seen that we are still loved by God
God is our father.
And we’re the apple of his eye.
His eyes are always on us, praise Him!
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.
This article has been read 1223 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
D. Phenes
10/18/05
First article I have read from this perspective.. Wow.
Phyllis Inniss 
10/19/05
A new way of looking at that early encounter with sin. Very original.
Shelley Snyder
10/22/05
I enjoyed reading this. I really liked how you used the last word of one paragraph to start the next. Good job!
Jan Ackerson
10/24/05
Michelle, this poem was a masterpiece. I was one of the judges this week, and poetry is one of my loves. The intricate craftsmanship of this poem is the work of a truly gifted poet. You made it flow, despite the discipline it took to echo each line in the next. And then to top it off, you gave it a profound message. My hat's off to you for this awesome piece of work.
Deborah Porter 
10/24/05
Michelle, congratulations on your 2nd place win in the the Level 2 awards. I echo Jan's comments. This was excellent.

I also wanted to let you know that you ranked 11th overall (out of 135 entries), so definitely give yourself a big pat on the back. You deserve it! Love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)
Karen Treharne
10/27/05
I love to read and even write poetry, but I especially admire a gifted writer such as you are, Michelle. It is from reading such talent that I grow more appreciative of God's gifts. You are a blessing and you honor God with this beautifully written poem. Congratulations on your win.