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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Illustrate the meaning of “All that Glitters is Not Gold” (without using the actual phrase or literal example). (01/24/08)
The king called out to the servant, "Bring to me the finest goblet in the royal kitchen, for I have a toast to drink to the fairest maiden in the land. This day, my son, the Prince of Paradise, has finally revealed his desire to wed. I could not be happier with his choice. She is from the finest family. Her grandfather was my father’s chief counselor for over twenty years and never was there a man more faithful than he. And, on top of it all, she is more beautiful than the rising sun and glows with the radiance of the full moon. Nay, bring two of the finest goblets. I will drink the toast with my son. I hear him coming down the hall.”

“Hail Father. I see my news has brought a happy countenance unto the palace and a smile to your face.”

“It shows that easily. Why good. Good indeed. I am happy my son. You have made a wonderful choice. Young Jasmine will make a perfect wife and someday a perfect queen to rival your mother, I suppose.”

“Now Father, do not let your perpetual sorrow at my mother’s passing dampen the spirit of the moment. Let’s take the cups the servant brings even now and drink a toast to Jasmine, my wife and queen to be.”

“Hear, hear, I bid your wish be granted. Drink hearty my son.”

“What ferment is this, Father? The liquid in the cup looks like liquid…well…like liquid gold.”

“It is my son, from golden grapes. The royal vintner has just perfected the harvest of them. What was once thought impossible, not unlike your taking of a wife, is now so. Gold dust combined with seed. Now drink and tell me what you think.”

Both men swilled the cup and threw it back, but the son’s lips did not part. The vintner, Jasmine’s cousin, at her instruction, and with the knowledge of the prince, had made the vintage with the dust of Satan. There is no such thing as a golden grape. There is no such thing as perfection in a woman…or man. The king is dead and Jasmine will now soon be the perfect queen.
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Laury Hubrich 
02/02/08
Oooh, what intrigue! I like this. I didn't know where you were going with this until the end. Great writing! Great use of dialogue! Good job!
Laury
Jan Ackerson
02/02/08
Really good fairy tale--I wish you'd used all of your words, and added more character development. Resist the temptation to summarize the ending--you've got great potential and you did a super job with the topic of the see.
Leigh MacKelvey
02/03/08
Nice story! I liked the "kingly" language. I wanted more, though.
I wanted to know the characters better so I could grasp the reason the prince and his future bride wanted to poison the king.
Nice take on the topic. You write well.
Laury Hubrich 
02/05/08
You made the list for the Beginner Blessings this week! Congratulations! Here is the link: http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=17610