The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/27/06
You have lots of really good stuff here--I've read many entries this week, and you may be the only one who thought to use the Moses/serpents illustration.

My only suggestion would be to find fresher ways to make your point--this piece uses a lot of what I call "Christian-ese"--language very familiar to Christians (thus, we only skim it), and very foreign-sounding to non-Christians (thus they are just puzzled).

Your faith really shines through on this little essay!