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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Work (07/27/06)
Jennie and Jane were born on a cool balmy night,
Two little girls who were bonny and bright.
A joy to behold and a pleasure to see,
Their parents as proud and happy as could be.
They shared with the girls their good thoughts and advice,
Although Jane more often than not, had to be told twice.
Until the day dawned when they were off to live each their own life,
Hoping they were ready to face any troubles and strife.

Jennie met a young man, who swept her off her feet,
They wed, for better and worse, and these vows she intended to meet.
Marriage isn’t easy and sometimes compromise is the name of the game,
So Jennie worked hard to solve any issues that may make it go lame.
Jane wanted what her sister had, wanted it with effortless ease,
But relationships need care and attention, not doing just as you please.
Very soon, Jane was sad and alone as her marriage did split,
Never having the inclination to try, so from one liaison to another she flit.

Jennie waited tables to help with the bills, friendly, happy and chatty.
Going the extra mile for her patrons and never being ratty,
Although at times she was tired and her feet would grate,
Idle she was not and her hard work paid off as her tips were great.
Jane coveted her sister’s lifestyle and desired extra treats,
But became bored and disgruntled with managing such feats.
Instead, the easy way beckoned and huge debt was swift,
As she battered her credits cards for each little gift.

Jennie had a love of her garden that was filled with flowers,
She reared all her own plants from tiny seed that took many hours.
The watering and feeding and words of support,
And a battle with weeds that was definitely hard fought.
Jane spent much of her time in Jennie’s oasis,
Her own patch of yard was sure one to miss.
All the hassle of mowing the grass and digging the bed,
She had more things to do before she was dead.

Jennie had a wide circle of friends and parties to attend,
A cake to bake and always a thank you note to send.
Forever on hand with tea, kind words and compassion,
She made the effort with all of her friends whatever the fashion.
Jane blew hot and cold and was a fair weathered chum,
Tales of woe and problems shared just made her go numb.
Those deemed no longer trendy was dropped like a coal,
Until eventually, she didn’t know a sole.

Jennie and Jane entered the home on a cool balmy night,
Two old ladies, but only one who was bonny and bright.
One, a joy to behold and a pleasure to see,
The other, as miserable and petulant as she could be.
Jane complained life had been unfair and Jennie had had all the breaks,
What was her secret in getting the best and avoiding the fakes.
“My secret in life is simple and true,
Hard work in buckets is what you should do.”
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This article has been read 891 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Corinne Smelker 
08/04/06
A sweet piece that I believe holds great truths. ALthough your characters were over-empahized in order to make your point (which can sometimes be a problem, a general rule of thumb is you still have to make your bad guy somewhat sympathetic) on the whole you did a good job.
Helen Paynter
08/10/06
A nice distinction and a good message. You have a good ear for rhyme, now try concentrating on metre. It's hard to get it all into a short line! Well done.