The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1374 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
09/12/05
He sent His begotten Son with whom He is well pleased. Good entry to mark Jesus' entry to earth.
It's not difficult to capture the emotions that usually accompany such departures. You were able to picture the moment and the emotion that characterised Christ journey to earth to redeem us. Good entry!
09/13/05
The only suggestion I have is a few commans in the last few exchanges of dialog: "Bon Voyage, Father" and "Bon Voyage, my Son." Great, creative idea for this topic!
09/13/05
Yikes, I meant "commas."
09/14/05
There is an article almost exactally the same in the Beginner category and personally, I think theirs is better. But good idea and keep at it! God bless.
After reading the first paragraph, I knew what this story was about. Good writing skills though!