Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Angry (08/02/07)
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TITLE: The Beast Within | Previous Challenge Entry
By Christian st john
08/08/07 -
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When I wake it’s there greeting me with its icy cold grip; when I lay down I toss and turn as it prowls within me searching for its next victim.
I try to control this… let’s call it a beast; like most other untamed creatures it can appear harmless and then without warning it strikes, ripping and tearing at its helpless prey.
I am afraid to go into the world around me for fear that it will take over and leave in its path a trail of pain and destruction; I long for friendship and companionship but I know it’s all in vain because the beast won’t let me be.
I hate this beast but it is part of who I am, it’s part of me. I often envision what this beast would look like if it could manifest itself. I imagine it to look like a horrific looking monster dreamed up by some Hollywood producer and then I catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror or window. It’s then that I realize that the beast does have a face, even if only used on a part time basis… like a time share it moves in when it so desires.
And there are no areas of my life it doesn’t affect; it’s there all the time provoking me, pushing me, spurring me to let them have it because it lies to me telling me that they deserve it; all those other people, those who talk viciously about me behind my back, them that would seek to hurt me… again.
But we can’t them can we? We know that if we do not stand up for us, whatever it takes, they will simply take advantage of us. They will use and abuse us and take all that we have worked hard to achieve and obtain. Who needs them? Really, who needs them? Hurt them before they hurt us, crush them before they know what hit them. Damn them… damn them all!
No! Let me be. Go back from whence you came, you dark and vile beast and ensnare me no longer. Loosen your grip on me; release the chains that bind me... let me be free!
Oh, how I long for freedom; to live my life the way I desire; to live apart from the burden of this beast; to come out from under its yoke. Oh, what a joyful day that would be but it’s just wishful thinking for I know it will take a miracle. It will take for someone else to come in and kill the beast.
But who can take on this beast and live? Who can take a stand against it and claim the victory? No mere man can tame this beast let alone destroy it; many have tried and all have failed miserably. Why? Because they each have their own beast to contend with, each with its own unique nature, each with its own sphere of control and authority.
So what will it take, who can release us from this beast I shall call Rage? My guess is it will take for someone more than a mere man to conquer this beast within us all… but who?
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