The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1412 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
08/25/06
The phrase the grabbed me the most, for some reason, is "choking acceptance." I've been there! I like the parallel structure here--very nice.
08/28/06
This is like reading a painting.

Through the first stanza I see dark blues and blacks in broad, heavy, thick strokes across the canvas.

The second stanza is red, bright red at first, then turning to crimson, quick erratic strokes flashing across, a frenzy of slathering paint, then slower. Then lighter as the red turns darker.

The last stanza is yellow and green, light full strokes, filling in the gaps, bringing contrast and light to the previous colors. It is light and airy, comforting.

That you can use words to provoke my mind to see colors says a lot about your writing. This was a fun experience to read.
Your choice of descriptive words is...the work of a master!! :-)

Favorites:

desperate...hopelessness
tormenting despair
searing convulsion of fury
consuming anguish

and...

choking acceptance
erratic forgiveness
soothing conciliation
umerited rebirth



I agree, this is truly a masterpiece!
Indeed, masterfully written. A vivid portrait.
08/29/06
why is it so hard for us to 'see?' Why is it so hard for 'it' to stay?

A work of art that leaves one breathless! Awesome ...
08/29/06
Such vivid, amazing images! A "master"piece! Wow!
08/30/06
Amazing piece of work here. I agree -- your pen is like a brush in the hand of an artist. Such vivid pictures you drew! Incredibly creative! Masterful! :)