The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1444 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
07/24/08
You kept me hanging on right to the end to find out where the telephone came in. Excellent ending.
07/26/08
The atmosphere of this piece is palpable, masterful! Excellent descriptions, and an incredible twist. Absolutely top-notch piece.
Wow! I love this. I felt like I was at the diner. Your creative descritpions were masterful. I love the twist at the end. I'm ready for chapter two!
Engaging story! I guessed at the ending and wasn't dissapointed. Would love to read the full story. Let us know if you write a novel. ;-)
Very enjoyable. Excellent mis-direction.
07/29/08
I like the way the regulars interact in your story. Nice job on telling one of the stories behind the faces at the cafe.
07/29/08
Completely hooked, didn't see it coming. I felt as inquisitive as your MC while reading this. Love the "road" imagery. Excellent.
I was drawn into the scene by the first paragraph. Loved the minute details and the unexpected ending. Excellent!
Sharlyn, this had me completely engaged the whole read and I really liked the unforseen twist at the end. Everyone and the events all seemed so real. Wonderfully done! Loren
08/05/08
Delightful story. Has a "homely" feel about. Once I warmed up to grasp the background descriptions (sorry, it's just me - I never notice my surroundings like my wife does!) I could really feel I was in the cafe, watching the romance unfold.
But still it seemed too good to be true, so that twist at the end had just the right impact. Well done.