Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Search Engine (10/06/11)
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TITLE: The Bet | Previous Challenge Entry
By Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom
10/20/11 -
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I eyed him while he rocked on his toes, “Ready? The bet is on. I know I can find the definition faster in my dictionary than you can using Google. Remember loser makes dinner for a week.’’
Nodding, his muscles twitched with anticipation, “Bring it on. I’ll have the answer before you even find your dictionary. Go!”
He raced to the computer desk while I darted to the bookcase. I grabbed the red dictionary as other books tumbled to the ground. Singing off-key, “A, B, C, D, E, F, G…” I flipped through the pages.
Just as I found the I section, I heard my husband groan from the other room. “Why is the computer off? No fair! You have to want until it powers on.”
Laughing hysterically, I plopped to the floor. “I told you the electricity went out today just long enough to turn the clocks and computers off. And it is fair, when we made the bet you told me that you weren’t going to wait for me to find the dictionary so I don’t have to wait for the computer to boot up. Ha, I found it. What’s for dinner?”
Standing over me scowling, my daughter mumbled to herself and rolled her eyes, “Well, what’s the definition?”
I closed the book and handed it to her, “Look it up yourself.”
She tossed the dictionary on the bed and trotted into the living room. “Da-a-d-d-dy!” My husband catered to his little princess and got a chance to use Google after all, but I had a delightful laugh and the most delicious hot dog for dinner.
In the end, the whole situation made me stop and think how wonderful God is. My husband is a computer geek. He thinks Google is one of the greatest inventions ever. He uses it quite efficiently while I prefer my good old-fashioned books.
Sometimes our differences are so vast; I wonder how we managed to stay together all these years. However, at other times, I see how well we complement each other. The computer tends to break down in an almost suicidal way whenever I am near it; in contrast, my husband is like an artist when it comes to that frustrating machine. I do well with people; talking comes easy to me. Therefore, if there is a discrepancy on a bill, first my husband will do a search on the computer. If that doesn’t produce results then I get on the phone with customer service.
God created us differently so that we would work well as one. On the days when I’m not frustrated by these divergences, I say a prayer of thanksgiving for my lovable computer geek, who is so wonderfully antithetical from myself.
Later that night, while watching TV, I poked my husband in the ribs, “Who is that actress? I know she was in some other show.”
Smiling smugly, my husband handed me the laptop, “Look it up yourself.”
Grrr, husbands and computers, I guess I have to love them. And I do.
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Very strong beginning that caught my attention and kept me reading. Spot on topic, and creative treatment. I think these three categories are your strongest. Plus, the humor is excellent. I thought some of the dialog could flow a little more naturally¡Ktoo much explanation seems to crossover into telling instead of showing. The transition to a spiritual application seems forced. I think if you omitted ¡§made me stop and think how wonderful God is,¡¨ and started with ¡§my husband is a computer geek,¡¨ your application would be much stronger. 2nd to last sentence is a great finish, but the very last sentence seems tacked on. Could probably be worked in better to bring it home.
Overall, very strong and enjoyable read.