The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Oh, the audacity of youth, that they whole-heartedly believe that they are of one mind with their peers. Yet even a van, complete with red racing stripe, is unable to pull Fumiko’s reality into the MC’s Don Quixote day. A tender but viable lesson we all must learn someday – we are different for different reasons as evidenced by this one line “…parents operated on the other end of the ambition spectrum.”
All is not lost in this story - I think the two can still get together, right? lol. This captured and held my attention. Nice job:)
Such fun-- all the way through. I love the creativity here.
So very creative and superb storytelling. Well done!
Very kool. WOuld like to learn more. Great character. I love the cello. Thanks for the read. God bless.
This is so typically Lisa. Masterfully executed, and so much said in so few words. It reminded a bit of the Hollies song, "Bus Stop." If you're too young to remember that, grab the video somewhere on the net and listen. Thanks for the enjoyable read.
Great character-driven piece. Not the trite ending that would have been so easy.
I really do feel stupid here! Obviously my earlier comment was intended for the entry before yours. I wouldn't declare this "fun"! It is, however, extremely well written. I was so angry at the parents and the brother, and my heart was broken for the mc.
I hope my insanity is temporary, and that very short-lived. I wish I could erase the wrong comments! The other comment was for Jan's story.
I'd read this one several times and planned to come back to it.You have so much going on between the lines, it's a piece to really think about. The characters were so real, and I was so hoping the girl would make the right choice, but, as you showed--she just wasn't strong enough.
I have to admit, I haven't read Don Quixote, so I don't really get the ending. Facinating story, though, and very realistic.
I'm always amazed by your stories and your characters--so rich, so detailed, so absolutely human! Loved how you tied it together with that wonderful, bittersweet last line. (I'm glad you like Richard Strauss, too!:)
Another masterpiece from Lisa's personal masterpiece theater. This actually could be made into a movie! Great job, loved this.
Umm, I didn't get the ending either, but I totally got that I was supposed to get it. Does that even make sense? I genuinely liked this MC - slow paced, but itching for something more. Smart, but not too clever. A dreamer, but a doer as well. And I love how you say SOOOOO much without hardly saying anything at all. An absolute art.
A piece that appears to be written so effortlessly...and yet we know the talent it takes to accomplish.
Just splendid!
Oh, I LOVED this. It was wonderful!! Fumiko was an excellent, memorable character. I loved this entire read, and the last line is soooo bittersweet. What a read!
Ahh, chasing windmills. This was very powerful...their lack of control over their own future was palatable. Loved it.
This one struck me more than the others, I think because as a musician I didn't feel very in control of my future. I did stand up for my desires though, and my mom let me go into nursing. A very poignant piece.
I love how you weave stories together! ... I wanted to know more! :)
This was really good and I'm glad I came back for another look. The contrast between the families and the vulnerability of youth was excellent. To be honest, I have struggled a little to understand some of your more recent writings, but this one hit home. Cheers.