The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1209 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
03/04/07
Oh, I love this story. Remember that all numbers under 100 should be spelled out. Also, try to stay away from passive voice, and be aware of tense, as there was an awkward shift towards the end. This is a great story and concept, and I'd love to see it reworked and expanded.
03/04/07
Nicely told. I was able to mentally see the different scenes you portrayed. Good job!
How frightening for a ten year old! I thought that you used the topic creatively in this story.
03/05/07
This was a moving story that had my full attention beginning to end. You are a good story teller. Keep at it!
Thought provoking story. God always comes through.
03/07/07
WOW - very good.
03/07/07
Excellent story, and very inspiring. I almost think it'd be more effective ending at "We will not die today." That's where the POW is. Be careful of weather / whether.

This held me spellbound...nice job.
What a wonderful story--so well told. I was so eager for them to be safe. Good job!
03/07/07
A wonderful telling of a moving story. I was engrossed from beginning to end.
03/08/07
This truly touched my heart and I can only imagine how she felt when she learned to sew. Our Lord has perfect timing. Thanks for sharing this
This is very well told - I could hear a Russian immigrant speaking the words of your MC. Knowing it is true story awes me. God is SOO good! I noticed some tense shifts - watch out for that. Otherwise, good job!
03/08/07
This held my attention from beginning to end. I think you could have stopped short of the last paragraph -- that would have been a powerful ending. The rest was nice to know, but climax to the drama came earlier. Thanks for sharing this wonderful story.