The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
11/09/06
I enjoyed the unexpected twist of this poem--the "ailment" being one of "lovesickness." Very cleverly done--I didn't see that coming! Also especially liked the descriptive line about her legs turning to goo.
11/10/06
Good rhythm and form. The ending is a little expected though. Keep writing!
11/11/06
Unexpected..? Ha.. I knew what was wrong for the first line of simptoms... good form with it, flowed nicely.. Although that ending was rather sad... poor girl.. ;)
Oh cute! Love the name of the clinic: Clinic Where We Handle All. Could just see those clinical white coats and clipboards. :-)

Had to wonder how much those lovesick pills cost (and if they were covered by insurance - HA!).

Liked the light twist to this - refreshing!!!

11/13/06
Please post more of your poems at Poetry and Poets of God: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/poetryandpoetsofgod/
11/14/06
How neat! What a treat! I'm out of my seat, and on my feet...with applause.

At first I thought it should have quotes for the dialogue; but, pondering on it - this could just be your own unique style. Very good! I liked it!
What a cute and enjoyable ditty to give us a chuckle in the midst of a sea of white coat entries! Fun and witty!
11/16/06
A love sick DAVEY for you!

11/17/06
very cute...I love the lightheartedness of this, today. thanks, Laurie...I so need some light moments and I tend to forget that. this was just what the dr. ordered!
11/17/06
This is delightful, Laurie! I agree with the comment that it is fun to find a light-hearted piece of writing in the WC mix. You did a good job, here.
11/19/06
Hahaha! I really loved this, Laurie. Your last several poems have been absolutely brilliant. Great work!
11/19/06
How did I miss this one? What a delight to readwith a few chuckles along the way!

And so creative.

Well done Laurie! ;)