Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Spam (not the meat) (11/03/11)
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TITLE: Specifically Meant For You | Previous Challenge Entry
By Hiram Claudio
11/11/11 -
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I had planned for days that I would take today and just focus on filing, processing, and overall cleaning up my desk at home. The mounds of paper and clutter had gotten really bad.
As I went through the stacks, I found unopened and opened junk mail. Advertisements for new credit cards and serious alerts about bank accounts I don’t have. It seemed endless. Why do I get all this junk mail anyway? Don’t these people realize how intrusive they are? Since most of it had personal information about me, I shredded them one by one, so annoying!
I needed a break from the paper mountains so I logged into my email account. More junk. I had over one hundred email messages from people I don’t know and don’t care to. One wanted me to click a link to check out some new work-from-home opportunity. Another told me I had two millions dollars in a, previously unknown to me, bank account in South Africa. SPAM! Electronic junk mail. Is there no escape?
I needed some air. So I shut everything down and went for a walk. It’s Fall here on Long Island. The trees are an explosion of colors. Soft tones of orange and brown with hints of yellow were all around me. The chill in the air, along with the brisk wind in my face, reminded me of the unique sensations of Autumn in America’s Northeast. Leaves were falling as I walked. Newly decorated pumpkins were carefully placed in the doorsteps of many homes I passed. I saw a few squirrels skirting past as they gathered food. They stopped to stare at me for a moment, then continued on with squirrel-like quickness.
I looked upwards and thanked the Lord for His presence in my life. I also asked Him to forgive me for letting something as silly as junk mail, whether paper or electronic, interrupt my peace even for a moment. I heard His voice tell me, “Look at the beauty around you.” I once again focused on the unique features of nature during this season. I said to Him, “It’s all so amazing, so beautiful.” He then said to me, “and I did it all for you!”
I pondered that for a moment. For me? So amazing! And in that instant it hit me why the junk mail had gotten to me. It wasn’t just the time that it robbed me of to deal with it. It was more about the nature of what it was, information sent to ‘me’ but where I was irrelevant. Not only did the senders not know me, they don’t care about me either. They were sending information to my email inbox, or my physical mailbox, and yet none of it was specifically intended for me. It might as well have been addressed to ‘occupant’ (and some of it was).
Yet the Lord was reminding me of just how much I am intentionally on His mind. All His creation, the beauty and wonder, is here for me to enjoy. And His message of love and freedom is a personal one, specifically meant for me. When He gave His life at Calvary, He was dying for ‘me’ not just for ‘occupant.’ His messages to me are focused and with purpose, to communicate an overwhelming love and His desire for a relationship with … me!
I thanked Him for His presence in my heart, and for His power to un-clutter the junk that may get in there at times. I returned home and the hills of paper that I had left were still there. I turned on my computer and I had received another seventy five emails in the short time I was gone. I smiled. Thinking about the senders of each email, I realized they don’t know me and I don’t know them … “But Jesus, you know them!”
I prayed that His great love would touch them and would let each one know how much He desires to walk with them, just how much He loves them, and how that His great love for them is specifically meant for … them.
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I loved the imagery while the MC was taking a walk,and the thoughts within the MC's mind.
The ending was especially lovely- praying for the souls of all the people who elicited the SPAM mail. That was touching. Great job!
God Bless~
Use action verbs instead of an exclamation point to get your sense of excitement across. Also when God answers you, make sure you have his words in a new paragraph as you should start a new one each time you switch speakers.
It's funny how little things can bug us. I love how God stops us and reminds us of what rally matters. You did a nice job expressing your message.
The beginning could have been better ... could have grabbed me more, and I'm not sure why you used an exclamation mark.
I liked your description of fall. However, when you mentioned "fall" and "autumn" you capitalized them both. Seasons aren't capitalized unless they are within a title or the beginning of a sentence.
You also switched from past tense to present tense when you wrote, "It’s Fall here on Long Island." Eventually you went back to past tense.
Overall this is a nicely written and peaceful sort of story. I enjoyed going on the walk with the MC in the fall. Great job.
Great imagery and thoughts.
Lots of potential. Keep writing!
This was one of my "personal favorites." Brilliant job of bringing forth an important message, and it was well written. I wouldn't change a thing! I can see this being published in a Christian Magazaine. Nicely done.
Great job! God Bless you~