The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
09/13/05
I like the way the hummingbird motif tied it together at the beginning and the end. To make it easier on your readers' eyes, add more white space between paragraphs, please.
09/14/05
Well done thou good and faithful servant. You rose to the occasion and came out a better person. As you say it doesn't matter who gained more from the experience. You did a good job and it felt good.
It would have been interesting if you had framed your experience "through the video camera", so to speak. Use your words to take the pictures, and then contrast that with setting down the camera to give your own testimony. In fact, the camera is a kind of witness.