The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
11/19/06
I love how this story comes full circle! A great message. I found some of the dialogue a little rough, but this was a great tale with a great message!
11/22/06
A delightful story, however needs a lot of editing, especially in the dialogue department. Keep on writing, great potential. God Bless.
11/23/06
Serious message for teenagers who are ready and anxious to leave the safety of their parents' home and go out in the big, wild world. It's not so easy and safe out there without Jesus as your Lifeguard.
I like the way that you wove the theme throughout the story. Keep writing!