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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Garden (09/07/06)
I was thrust down in a deep, dark hole. They covered me up so I could no longer see the light. What was happening? Then I could feel something cold and wet. I realized water was seeping in on me. I could no longer move and panicked because I was stuck with no one to help me. After what seemed like a very long time, I felt my outer layer being stripped from me. It really felt rather good because it gave me a little more room to move around in this tight space. I continued to move and soon I found myself poking my head out of the ground. Ah, sunshine again! How good the warmth felt to me after being so cold and wet under the ground for so long.

Now that I am above the ground, I am getting taller but part of me is still underground. I heard a human walking through the garden saying, “That one must have good roots because it is getting taller every day.” I looked around and saw that there were other plants there, too. Some of them looked like me, but most of them looked different. As time went by, the sunshine and water helped us to continue to grow. We looked more different every day. Some of us grew into vegetables, some fruit, and even some bloomed with the most beautiful flowers. The gardener came through periodically and roughed up the soil around us and chopped out the weeds that were choking us. I heard him say, “This cultivating of the plants is necessary so they will grow into what they are meant to be.”

Jesus is quoted in Matthew 13:31-32 (NIV) like this “He told them another parable: 'The kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed, which a man took and planted in his field. Though it is the smallest of all your seeds, yet when it grows, it is the largest of garden plants and becomes a tree, so that the birds of the air come and perch in its branches.'"

I came to understand that there is something mysterious that happens when a seed is planted. When I first came into being, I wasn’t sure what God had in mind for me. Sometimes I have had to struggle through dark times. After those times, I found I was better equipped to emerge into the beautiful being that was my destiny. My role may be as small as peas, as medium as apples, as large as a magnolia flower, or as gigantic as the tallest tree so birds of the air can perch on my branches. Whatever my role, it will be achieved as God ordained when I allow myself to learn from the dark times.
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This article has been read 887 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Rachel Burkum
09/15/06
Very good point, and came across well.
I noticed in the second paragraph for one sentence it became present tense, and that threw me a little - though I really liked the analogy.
Keep writing!
Jan Ackerson
09/16/06
This is written from a clever POV, and I appreciate the creativity. My problem is with the 3rd paragraph--how can a plant know what the scriptures say? My personal preference for this type of piece is for the "voice" of the story to only know what that (plant, animal, whatever) would actually know...dirt, sun, rain, the gardener, etc.

Great title!
Sandra Petersen
09/18/06
The lesson you taught here is very well-stated. Great analogy to real life!

I guess I would be even more descriptive with what was happening to the plant as it germinated, grew, and observed its surroundings. Also, go through your article looking at verb tenses and making sure all agree. Sometimes you can determine a more eloquent way of writing a phrase or sentence by reading your article out loud, even if just to yourself.

My favorite line: "My role may be as small as peas, as medium as apples, as large as a magnolia flower, or as gigantic as the tallest tree so birds of the air can perch on my branches." For some reason that statement made me think about my own role.

Good job!