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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Life (06/15/06)
WITCH WITHOUT WISDOM

She always came home, like the waves quietly come to shore, and everytime, she left like a hurricane. She knows no quietness in her heart. Emotionally stuck, turning 23 she has not passed the immaturity of a 16 year old. Drugs and alcohol swallowed her teen years. Always looking for someone to blame for her current lack and unhappiness, she has become a finger pointing Witch without wisdom, a foolish woman, always in defense.
Every night at the commencement of darkness, she’d be sure to get in a taxi, dressed in black to earn the money that has become so necessary to her happiness. Gold her only hope. Explaining to her that the sins of one generation are passed on to the next by parental example, and that her 2 little girls are at risk to turn out just like her, she’d blame me with indignation of cursing her life. Sow trouble, reap the same. She did not want to understand that. In the blackness of a barren night another child was conceived. Impossible and futile this new beginning, the unfortunateness, her misfortune. The lover claimed he can not be the father. Not blameless she shut her mouth. Indeed - it could be the seed of any. She despised the life within her and did not want to accept adversity.

Her iniquity, a pathless wilderness. A man full of talk, spoke of wickedness, evil sweet in his mouth, comforting her with empty words. He is an adulterer, a forger of lies, his promises can come to nothing, nothing! He disguises his face, waits for twilight, his breath offensive as he speaks his rotten mind. Her empty spirit drank in his poison. Yet, he was as much the prey as she was. Crumbling foundations in the dust, they are building ruins for themselves. Sudden fear troubled me. Should I hold my tongue? Would God not punish me, for allowing her to kill her unborn child, should I then not rebuke her? Children should be given life to, allowed to live and dance and sing to the music, rejoice to the Glory of God, not be slain like sheep.

Sparks fly, bitter things said. A thunderbolt and she’s gone - again. What have I done? Lift up my face to God, my only hope. Dear Lord, let Your will be done, in my life and hers, more I can not ask for.
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This article has been read 946 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Helen Murray
06/23/06
How brave you are to tackle this terrible fact of death in our times, and to share you effort to redress such injustice. I applaud this piece.
Sherril Wendling
06/23/06
Powerfully and courageously written! You illustrate Life by vividly portraying the mind of Death. I was arrested by this phrase: "He disguises his face, waits for twilight, his breath offensive as he speaks his rotten mind." Deliciously written to evoke utter disgust--excellent. At the end, I like the way you symbolize the Life-Death conflict between the two women with the "thunderbolt" image. You've got the gift; keep writing!
Zuanne Joubert
06/25/06
Trina Courtenay
06/27/06
This was really very good! :) Your use of words...such a wonderful gift. I feel I must leave a critique for you are indeed a gifted writer and to be published this needs to be edited. So with that said, the first letters in Witch & Wisdom should be caps, press enter after every para (white space makes for an easier read) and 2 should be written (after ten the choice, I believe, is yours).

Blessings & Keep writing for the glory of HIM!
Trina<><
Marilee Alvey
06/28/06
What an "unquiet soul" she is. You write that she leaves like a hurricane. I've seen people like that, too. You know, she is so unsettled and you've made us feel that. Although it is unscriptural, this is the type of person you could imagine "haunting" the earth, wringing her hands. You have done a wonderful job of capturing her and your dilemma. Thank you for your transparency. God bless.