I deserve it | Previous Challenge Entry

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TITLE: I deserve it | Previous Challenge Entry
By Emmanuella Ellis
03/15/18
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I have an intense desire for wealth and fame because I have seen other people with these things. Why do I have such an intense desire for them? Because I feel like I am entitled to them. I deserve to have them, why not if they have them then I also deserve to have them. How did they get all that? I donâ€™t but thatâ€™s ok because I am a Christian and loved by God. He is powerful enough to do and give me everything, so I will go and ask Him for it. I mean I go and demand it from Him because I expect Him to give them to me, I deserve it, I know this because I have seen other people possessing them. I will go down on my knees every single day not to thank the good Lord for all that He has given me and continue to provide for me but to make my demands. Demands shaped not out of concern for the glory of God or the plight of His people but by my desire to have what other people possess.

Why do I think I deserve to get whatever I desire? And why do I think it is expected of God to provide them to me, you ask? The answer is simple, itâ€™s because I am ungrateful and not at all content with everything I already have. Surely, I am not satisfied with God. I am looking at the world through the wrong pair of eyes. For some reason, I have forgotten about all the people who donâ€™t have a quarter of all the things, even the necessities of life. All the while, I am focusing on all that I donâ€™t have, not because I need them but because other people have it and I donâ€™t. There is one more reason. This is it, I forgot what grace meant and the role it has played in my life.

There was a time when all I deserved was eternal damnation because I had sinned against my God and Creator. My end was certain to be in hell and away from the presence of the Lord. But I didnâ€™t get what I deserved through Jesus Christ because grace found me. So truly, I donâ€™t deserve all the goodness the Lord grants to me and He is not expected to be good to me, He just is. Everything else I have received in my life ranging from physical, financial, and spiritual blessings is therefore solely by Grace.

And if only I could appreciate grace, greed will have no room in my heart. Because I will wake up every morning, overwhelmed by the goodness of the Lord as He protects, provides, and cares for a person who doesnâ€™t deserve to have His love. I will feel indebted to Him for everything He graciously provides for me especially when others donâ€™t have them. Then I will be concern more about finding all the ways I could live my life to please not to pay back but to say thank you. I will no longer be blinded by greed but by the grace of the Lord God Almighty. May His name be praised.

Interestingly, I can only come to the realisation of the Lordâ€™s goodness and renounce greed only through the grace of God. Therefore, I pray that the Lord in His graciousness will cause me to remember His goodness towards me and live every day with a heart of thanksgiving, for that will be pleasing to Him. Amen

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