Thirty Six Years of Happy Marriage | Previous Challenge Entry

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TITLE: Thirty Six Years of Happy Marriage | Previous Challenge Entry
By Robert Rutaagi
08/31/16
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THIRTY SIX YEARS OF HAPPY MARRIAGE

In life, there are experiences which are unforgettable. There was this catholic girl called Mary Louise, a young girl who lived in a nearby village. She had close relatives beyond my village whom she visited regularly. ML was gorgeously beautiful. Modern clothes had just been introduced in our villages to replace animal skin-skirts, so she was among the first to wear a dress. A modern dress plus her natural beauty created a frenzy crush to all her admirers.

Whenever ML was passing my village, all the boys and girls would gather to begrudgingly admire her.

For me, ML affected me differently – not so much because she was beautiful but because her coming on the scene coincided with my adolescence. Soon my childhood admiration turned into nocturnal dreams - ML appearing, talking to me and, sometimes, selecting me from all the others and touching me. That thrilled me in and outside my sleep.

Harmonizing and reconciling my tantalizing dreams with my adolescence, during wakeful hours, became a great challenge. Regrettably, there were bigger boys than myself who had better social skills and privileges to interact with her more intimately.

Some lucky man from a distant village married ML who, slowly, disappeared from the physical scene but remained indelibly imprinted in the mental world of those who saw her.

Later, at University, campus girls were generally arrogant and conceited, especially, to the likes of me who hailed from rural areas, male-only schools without any social skills to deal with girls.

Throughout my bachelorhood, I was confronted with mixed feelings about women who appeared to be mysterious- respectfully feared beings in some cultures such as the Kiga [mine] and Banyankole from South West Uganda. In those cultures, tradition mystically bestows upon women some cautious, awesome, intimidating instructions concerning certain behaviours.

For, example, as children, we were warned that it was dangerous to see a naked woman. Automatic blindness would strike anyone who deliberately or accidentally saw ‘’the private assets’’ of a woman! That was catastrophe in young children’s minds and I had this crazy mentality that I was always the target!

It was a cultural clever strategy to discourage stubborn kids desirous of accidentally or intentionally peeping at women’s private parts. At that time, rural women wore animal skin skirts which did not guarantee them enough privacy like modern under wears do. When later, under-wears became fashionable, conception taboos denied them chance to wear them.

Later, in my life, most beautiful women whom I met were intimidating and unfriendly. There was this Soga girl - Margaret whom I met when I lived and worked in Nairobi, Kenya. Her cousin, Janet, worked with me in the same organisation. Margaret was very beautiful and well-behaved.

They conspired to exploit my naivety. One thing led to another and before I knew it, l had a crush for Margaret. This went on for months until I became a victim. I lost both to other men.

In 1977/78, I won a scholarship and went to study in Cyprus. As a Rotary International and State co-sponsored student, I was entitled to attending frequent official parties It turned out that most Cypriots attend and dance with their spouses only. But I had no spouse. That was my loneliest time.

One morning, l woke up completely transformed- all my human desires had melted away except the newest – MARRIAGE. The only problem was the absence of a candidate.

Eventually, in 1979, by twist of extraordinary events, I met Celia. Before me, was my wife! It was pure love at first sight. I quickly processed all the information I needed to decide. By God’s grace, she was still single.

She surpassed all standards of an ideal wife which gave me a lot of joy. On 20 September 1980, we got married. Our happy marriage has been blessed with four children and three grandchildren plus many more blessings. Read my article in: FW WC Topic: JOIE DE VIVRE (delight in being alive): Title: Life, Love and Salvation.

For lack of better words to express my marriage experience, I dedicate this poem to Celia.

THIRTY SIX YEARS OF HAPPY MARRIAGE

Darling Celia Adah Kentwiga (CAKE),
Thirty six years of sleeping together,
Surely, have been:
Sweetly, Splendid, Serene, Serendipitous.
Steadfast, Secure, Sensuous, Sensible.

Spouseful, Solid. Sensational, Stately, Sound.
Sanctified, Sublime, Suave, Superlative.
Super, Stupendous, Superior, Spectacular.
Supernatural, Superb, Special, Salubrious.

Spiritual, Satisfying, Sentimental, Supreme.
Spontaneous, Soulful, Sincere, Soporific,
Sagacious, Saccharine, Spritely, Succulent,
Smart, Significant, Serious, Sexy, Smile-full.

NON-FICTION

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