Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Red (10/01/09)
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TITLE: Birds Flaunt It, Lips Wear It | Previous Challenge Entry
By Ruth Brown
10/06/09 -
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ADD TO MY FAVORITES
It makes so many statements. How can I ever share it's facets or it's meanings to me through my life?
It caught my eye even in the crib. It was in the flowers in the picture . It drew me to look .
It made me feel happy. That had to be the beginning of my life long love.
When I toddled around the yard I went to pick that one.. but Oh! it drew blood from my finger. It's like the flower I noticed.
It was on the seat of my swing. At Christmas it was all over the tree. It's light was always the brightest, the prettiest.
It's what made the first Radio Flyer wagon beautiful.
My first velvet dress glowed with it. Birds flaunt it. Lips wear it
I noticed it on my cheeks and my nose when I came in from the cold. You see it on my cheeks when I am embarrassed.
It was right there in my favorite pie too.
In Sunday School I learned about Adam and Eve, and the forbidden fruit.I figured it was the same as my wagon,only brighter and shinier and juicier.
It was in many of the Bible lessons, Rahab's chord, the shed blood of animal
sacrifice, in Pharoh's water, and in the name of a sea.
I have it in shoes, purses, shirts, flowers, pillows, utensils, and accsessories.
I began to see it as symbols in my life. Sometimes it represented deep dark sin in my life.
Later I knew it in the life saving blood of Jesus turning my soul white as snow.
It appears on hearts everywhere on Valentine's day and it symbolizes love in flowers for your sweety.
It's on signs that call us to stop at most intersections.
Blood, sin, life, redemption, love, stop, attention, eye catching....God knew exactly how important that it would be... When He Created ....Red.
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I like the message here. I did notice a few minor grammatical issues, but nothing that detracts seriously from your piece.
This is very nice. Keep writing.
A few nitpicks: "It's" with an apostrophe means "it is" or "it has". In your first paragraph, you have it coreectly once, but the other times it should be "its" (no apostrophe=possessive). And watch the spacing of periods and commas: one space after, none before.
You're a good writer, you chose an excellent title, and I hope to read more entries from you in the future.
Colin
I "red" it and enjoyed it.
PS: Awesome Title!