The Official Writing Challenge
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Your story reminds us that as Christians, we must remember that others are watching our behavior. Sometimes God uses family and friends to point us in the direction of His Spirit. Good point to remember!

I had difficulty putting the story plot line together. At one time you have fears that Josh is in trouble, yet later he's telling you he has found God. Inconsistancy there.

Hone up on grammar skills and perhaps working up an outline will help your story follow through more smoothly.

Keep writing and working it out.