The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/01/09
Your story is quite descriptive and the dialogue stays on track, but it is difficult to relate to one central theme, especially the challenge word phrase. I do find some of the wording offensive and this is probably not the right avenue to use it. You do have an obvious writing talent. Just try to focus on the theme and FaithWriter site objective.
02/02/09
You did a nice job for the word constraints. However, it may prove more beneficial to focus on one point rather than to cover so much ground in such a short amount alotted.
Very good writing.
Yes there were a couple of words that I didn't like much, but overall I think you tried to look at the race issue from an unusual perspective, without a straight telling of the historical Wilberforce.