The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
This is beautiful. I think all of us have a scared little girl or boy deep inside. I could feel the pain in the MC's word.

You had some tiny technical stuff like the weird spacing(Press preview before you hit submit so you can see the way your story will look to the reader and then you may have to go back and manually delete or add the spacing)Little things like missing quotation marks or typos can be picked up by a challenge buddy or a critique group (if you need help in finding one, PM me and I'll try to help)

The things I just mentioned are little things and shouldn't have a huge impact on your story. I really think you did a nice job of showing God's love and that he may very likely be speaking to someone at this minute through your words. Nice job.
The concept and storyline were very good. It held a lot of poignant moments, and a lot of truths.

God bless~