The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
You have a beautiful story in this piece.

The only thing is without paragraphs and punctuation and quotation marks. It's very difficult to read. You have some wonderful natural talent that just needs some polishing. Perhaps you could check the message boards for a critique group or a challenge buddy.

I'd hate to have anyone miss this lovely message because they were overwhelmed by the format. You did a nice job covering the topic in your story.

I love the idea of a lighthouse, a beacon looking for the lost what a perfect metaphor. Keep writing and don't get discouraged. Only you can tell the stories God puts on your heart.
This was a wonderful story filled with pivotal moments of importance with the message it brought.

Nicely done. I won't go into the "paragraph" issue, Shann mentioned it already. Perhaps it is automatically doing that. I know it happened to me a couple of times. You can "preview" how it will look before you hit submit.

But, a really powerful story that held my interest, and made me realize you have the "gift of writing" I look forward to more entries from you.

God bless,

Thank you both your critiques were taken with great importantance. I look forward to working with this site for a time of no less than forever. You both have been a blessing to me I was afraid I wouldn't receive anything good. I have been writing since I was a child but never posted or formatted anything. I will take your advice but unfortunately I believe that the device I am using will not allow for certain editorial fixes. Please if you feel the urge to help I will surely not deny you. I could use all the help I can receive. Thank you again. Brian ward