The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
You did a fantastic job with this story. I felt connected to the MC immediately. I really liked the part where she realized the pain and hurt she felt was worth helping another find Jesus. Great job!
Erin's a great character!

Since she knew her closed-door conversations and her lunch might be misinterpreted, might she not have been proactive and told everyone what was going on?

I love that you introduced her husband into the equation, and made them all good friends at the end. Wonderful touch.
A very well written and encouraging piece. Sometimes we really need to go all the way out to reach someone for Christ even at the risk of being misunderstood by others. If Erin has chosen to walk away so as not to be misunderstood, Brian would not have a chance to come to the Lord.

Just a suggestion, you may wish to use quote marks for the soft voice of God "The humiliation ..." That would help direct the reader to know the switch from the story teller to a voice or thought. If it is a thought, italicize the text.

Great work! Glad Brian and Chad became great friends at the end of the story.

Congratulations for placing in the top 10 of your level!