The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Good story, kept me in suspense. I was a little confused when the MC was blind but her tears blurred her vision.
Author's Note:

My first draft of the story was over a thousand words over and didn't seem to fit the topic. I couldn't fix either problems with the way I had it, so I had to change a lot of details:( One such detail was that the MC was able to see, and Brett was the one who was blind.

It wasn't until Wednesday evening that I decided to switch it, and clearly I didn't pay enough attention to editing. Thanks for pointing that out, and I apologize for the confusion.

This is full of suspense. Sometimes your phrasing made me stumble over the words. I wasn't sure why the tears would blur her vision if she was blind, but perhaps she wasn't totally blind. It was an exciting read. I could feel the MC's anxiety and fear. There's quite a bit more I want to hear about, but I understand you were limited to 750 words. The ending shows such faith and courage. I hope I would have been as brave as your MC.
I loved this story! I like the way you jumped into the story and then did the explanations later. You did a great job of creating suspense and drama. Also, I think I liked it better that your MC was blind. You did a great job of showing her helplessness and yet not making her a weak character. Keep writing!
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