The Official Writing Challenge
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Oh what a heart wrenching but excellently told story. You had me captured from the beginning to end! Would LOVE to hear more about this little boy with hopefully and prayerfully, a happy ending for such a treasured little one.
07/15/10
Children are treasures from God - we need to reach them while they are young and tender, with the love of and for Jesus. Good job.
07/16/10
You did a good job telling the story. I was drawn into it. You have writing skill.
It might be weak on topic?
Keep writing.

Mona
07/16/10
Good job on this story. It was very heartfelt. You did a good job at capturing this audience.
07/16/10
Very touching story.
07/17/10
Well written, touching story.
That child would never forget the kindness shown to him that day from people who love Jesus. God Bless you,Ruth Brown
You had me captured too. I am not a very good reader. Yet, I love to write. For you to capture me in a story like this. I believe you have a special gift.

It is important to show kindess and love to those around us. Just as this little boy was captured in a moment after a bad incident, we too can capture others for Christ.

After all, all people need to do is to "trust Jesus"
This is so touching I have tears in my eyes from it. My favorite line was my heart heard Joey's pain. This speaks volumes. I almost wish that was the title, as it is such a perfect line. I do believe you'll soon move up to the next level.
Good descriptions, realistic dialogue, and heartfelt emotion make this a wonderful story. I did have a hard time seeing how it fits the topic HEAR, but maybe I missed something. Enjoy this piece.
07/20/10
I love your title. What a sweet boy with so many hidden secrets.
07/20/10
What a sweet story of hope for this little boy. You did a great job of expressing his fear and pain.