The Official Writing Challenge
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Interesting story, yet I felt like it ended too soon. What about the flash of white light?
Very intriguing story from the beginning to the end. I'm assuming the flash of white light was that of whatever exploded around him. Your story did seem a little rushed towards the end, but we are limited to a certain number of years. Although it is hard to think of what goes on in war, I think you did an excellent job conveying this scene to us. Was this a personal event? Good job.
nicely portrayed slice of life in the ME. the confusion from being wounded was real. the fear of dying, well written. i agree with the previous comment, though. it ended without resolution and left too many questions open. but, overall, well done.
You described pain and devastation in war in a creative way, perhaps from experience, but either way, it held my interest. Keep writing.