The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Wonderful ending (and new beginning) for Aubrey!

Some of your word choices are iffy; I noticed especially "collapsed" and "arduous" that didn't seem to be quite the right words. Work on showing, not telling.

I love how God sometimes directs us to just the right place at the right time.
I appreciated this inspiring little story, with its message of hope for the weary! We all come to various crossroads on our life journeys, and I'm glad Aubrey made the decision to follow the right path--the narrow Way to heaven!