TITLE: Even the Elect:an account of spiritual abuse Chapter 1/part 2 By Debbi Migit 06/17/14 |
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"You don't need to understand the dream," Gary said. His look was unlike any I had ever seen from Gary.
Flinty. Solemn. Cold.
"After we heard about Alex's seizure I looked at the dream again and I knew what it meant. The interpretation is this: Phil has an Absalom spirit and is trying to take the church away from me. Alex's seizure was a warning to you both. God has called me to pastor this church and Phil needs to ask His forgiveness for trying to usurp my authority."
I reeled back in my seat in shock. My mind was a mass of whirling thoughts and my emotions were shredded. Our precious baby boy, a miracle gift from God, was lying in a hospital bed just a few feet away. We were waiting for test results to tell us if he had a seizure disorder that might affect his whole life. He might even have a brain tumor. And our closest friends, our shepherds, were telling us that God had at least allowed, if not outright caused, our baby to be in this state. Because of our sin.
I looked at Phil, who had remained quiet throughout the conversation. Now he said, "Gary, my heart has always been to support you and help you in any way I can. I don't believe I have tried to take the church away from you. I'm not even sure how that could be done. But scripture tells us that we can't even know our own hearts, so in accordance with that, and in respect for your authority as our pastor, I will repent."
Quietly Phil prayed, asking forgiveness for anything he might have done that wasn't in accordance with God's plan for the church. He then asked Gary and Barb's forgiveness.
A few moments later visiting hours were over and Gary and Barb left us alone with our baby. I spent the night crying out to God, asking what was happening. Gary and Barb had seemed so stern and focused on our 'Absalom spirit'. I certainly knew the story of Absalom, King David's son, who had sat at the gates of the city, trying to poison people's hearts against David, so he could gain the kingdom. But in my heart of hearts I didn't believe that Phil or I had done that to Gary and Barb. We had gladly done whatever was needed to help the church plant prosper. We hadn't asked for a title or salary or any authority. Our hearts had been to serve.
But tonight fear had caused us to accept the name "Absalom". Because, unspoken, had been the threat, "Repent or something worse could happen to Alex."
I cried though out the night, not only for my baby, but from the deep wound in my spirit. For the first time I completely understood the term "Job's comforters'. But fear kept me from facing the truth of the deception we had witnessed that night. We had repented and we would be very careful from this point on to make sure Gary and Barb did not feel threatened in any way.
The next few days brought few answers. The doctors had absolutely no explanation for Alex's seizure. There had been no fever or infection. In fact, the CT scan had shown no sign at all that there had even been a seizure, although several EMT's, doctors and nurses had witnessed it. After three days, Alex was released from the hospital and we gradually went back to life, raising a normal, healthy two and a half year old.
Even our relationship with Gary and Barb returned to normal. Gary continued to work at our auto body during the week and pastor the church on the week-end. Phil and I led the worship team and helped with pastoral care. Barb and I talked almost every day, although we never again mentioned the dream or the "Absalom spirit."
But now there was a disquiet inside me. Something was not quite right. It was as if the seizure and our meeting with Gary and Barb had been the first rumbling.
A storm was coming. Sadly, I had no idea how devastating it would be.
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