Women
It’s Friday night. Tonight was another rough one Jesus. I feel so alone sometimes. After I tuck my little guy in and I look around, I realize the nature of it all. Here I am in this tiny place that I call home and even when the walls are closing in on me, you’re all I can think about. It’s you I desire Lord.. I know what they say when my back is turned. They think I’m odd and I hear them laugh as I turn and walk away.
A friend said I need the comfort of a man. But I told her I have the only man I’ll ever need. I know she didn’t understand Lord. But I do. I made that commitment to you Lord. I meant it when I said you were the only one for me. I know what’s it like to be cheated on , lied to, and disrespected. You are worthy of so much more than I can give. So, I give my broken heart to you Jesus. I give my physical self to you Jesus. You have done so much for me, how could I contemplate anything else?
Today as I walked past the jewelry store I stopped to glance at the wedding bands. My son gave me a puzzled look. “Why are you looking at wedding bands mommy, you’re getting a divorce, he replied looking rather perplexed. “I know, but the Lord is courting me now and soon I will wear his wedding ring”, I answered back. My 8 year old kid looked up at me with this look on his face. You know something...I think he got it. We walked out of the store with a quiet , calmness surrounding us.
Jesus...it’s another Friday night. Tonight was rough. I even cried in my own mess. But I stopped and thought of you. That’s why I’m writing this story. I know that you recognize my pain. I know you see me when I clutch on to the hope of a new day, and a new beginning. So if I seem to be immersed in my pain sometimes, can you forgive me momentarily? The girl next door flew in a rage because she thought her boyfriend and I were having an affair. I guess no one else can see what I am about Lord. So...while this world around me falls apart: I know I can count on you to pick me up in the midst of it all.
Last Friday I felt the sting of his affair as I cried my last cry. I cried one last time as I buried my husband. Looking down upon his grave...I knew it was time-to let it go-to walk away. So...I did. I walked away. And while I know there may be some more “rough” nights ahead, I know you’ll be there to help me carry the weight of this pain. And if I stop to think, I shall think I am the luckiest girl around. Why you say? Because I have you! I have the comfort of the only man who knows how to heal this wounded woman. I have the only man who will give His love unconditionally...to me. You Lord are all I need. And when my flesh wants to act a fool I will think of my one and only man...you.
Here I am Lord. It’s another Friday night. . I tucked my son under his covers for the last time. Finding my comfortable position on the living room couch I prepared myself for another Friday night.
I picked up Your word and held it close to my heart. I looked down at the gold band that sparkled on my ring finger. Just another reminder of You; the man in my life-Jesus-maker of heaven and Earth, Lord of all. the love of my life.
Isaiah 54:5
For your maker is your husband.
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