Short Stories
Christina’s text message couldn’t have been any clearer.
Drop dead!
I didn’t know why she couldn’t have told me to my face how she felt. I guess she just wasn’t very impressed with my “library” explanation concerning another woman.
I really had no idea Jillian was her hairdresser. I never thought hairdressers hung out at the library. I honestly cared a lot about Christina, but I didn’t think she knew anybody who read anything deeper than Cosmo.
Christina and I had been dating for a few months. We had fun together, but she was shallow as a rain puddle. For example, I asked how she felt about Hilary running for president. She said she didn’t think she was old enough. It turned out she thought I was talking about Hilary Duff.
The library incident started off innocently enough. I love to read, especially action books. I had my hands on a Tom Clancy novel when I spied this tall blonde with great hair. That should have been a clue.
She was sitting in the reading section with a Bible. That wasn’t unusual in itself, but this girl was a knock-out. I never associated women that looked so attractive with public scripture reading. It didn’t gel in my young mind. It wasn’t just her beauty that grabbed my attention, but the public Bible reading made me curious. I had to investigate further, so I sat down next to her.
“What are you reading?” It was one of those “clever” questions I wished I could have rewound quickly.
Her blue eyes shot me a quick glance with eyebrows crinkled, shook her head a little and re-fixed her gaze back to the Bible.
I never read the book, How to Pick Up Girls in the Library Reading Scripture, so I had to wing it.
“What I meant to say is; what part of the Bible are you reading?”
She put that little cloth thingy in the page she was reading, closed the book, sighed and looked at me again with her big blue eyes.
“I was reading the part about Judas parting the Red Sea before He slew Goliath. Have you ever read it?”
It had been quite a few years since I visited children’s church. I didn’t recall that story, but I didn’t want to sound stupid.
“Oh yes. It‘s one of my favorites.”
She opened her Bible again. “I thought so.”
My face turned a heated red. I knew I had just been busted, but I liked her style.
“So I take it, that wasn’t what you were reading?”
She didn’t look at me when she answered. “Nope.”
“I couldn’t convince you I knew that, and was just trying to be funny?”
“Nope.” She didn’t even smile.
“All right then, I’ll leave you alone. I admit I don’t know much about the Bible. But, I just thought it was cool you were reading it in a library, in public and all. Most people I know just do the religion thing on Sundays and, uh, anyway, I thought it was pretty impressive. Sorry for bothering you.”
I started to get up and leave.
“Wait a minute.”
I turned around.
“My name’s Jillian. What’s yours?”
“Ben Franklin.”
Her eyebrows crinkled again.
“It really is,” I said.
She invited me to sit down and we talked for hours. During the conversation I learned it was Moses and the Red Sea, David slew Goliath, and Judas had an issue with greed. I ended up going to church with her the next Sunday.
While Christina was getting her hair done that following Monday, Jillian must have told her about this Ben Franklin guy she met at the library. The next thing I knew, Christina was mad and not talking to me. I tried to text her from my cell phone and explain it wasn’t physical; I was just meeting an intellectual and spiritual need. That’s when she told me to drop dead.
I haven’t spoken with Christina since. But, I am going to the library again Saturday with Jillian. She says there are a few books by some guy named Frank Peretti that I just have to read. I don’t know where this is going with Jillian, but I am very thankful for Bible reading hairdressers in the library.
Note: This is another story I wrote for the READING challenge. It’s not that good, but it’s written, so I thought I would give it some light.
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I truly do love your sense of humor. I wouldn't put this in the "not so good" category but then that may be my system of grading. As a reader, it was captivating and heartwarming. Thanks for submitting it!
I always enjoy your stories! I love your sense of humor. Thanks for sharing your "library explanation."
Glad you posted this one, dear friend. Just LOVE it! I agree it was fun to see from the man's perspective!
I love comedy. Thanks for the lighthearted read. It's really neat, too, to see stories from the guy's perspective. One thing this guy should know: women are the master networkers...and they DO talk. Did you know that there are three types of communication, Bill? Telegraph, telephone...and tell a flight attendant! God bless!
SirWilliam, you are such a wit. You had me chuckling out loud---Jillian sounds a bit like Ann Coulter, to me. Not only stunningly beautiful, but too clever for words (at least I would never think that fast on my feet). And, the dialog plus reactions to what each of the characters had to say was just so real. This is another gem worth sharing. Thanks for a delightful "reading." It should be in the WC book!
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