Christian Living
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Just because you don’t agree with everything your friend or significant other says doesn’t mean your relationship is unhealthy. In fact, the opposite is true. Having a healthy disagreement proves that the relationship is healthy because both people have the freedom to have their own opinion about something without being judged or condemned by the other person. To take this to an extreme, only in a cult do people agree with everything their leader says without knowing anything about their personal life or motives.
God is the Only Person We Shouldn’t Disagree With
It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery (Galatians 5:1). Freedom in Christ doesn’t mean we’re free to follow Christ while living in sin and immorality, but it means that we’re free to live our Christians lives however we want without being bound by laws and religious practices.
The reason it’s hard to disagree with anything Jesus said or did is that Jesus is the only human who ever walked the earth who was also fully God (Colossians 1:15). Jesus may have said and did a lot of things that seemed strange like telling people to eat His flesh and drink His blood (John 6:56), calling one of His own disciples “satan” (Matthew 16:23), and sleeping on a boat with His disciples during a deadly storm (Matthew 8:23-27), but after we read the entire context of all those verses, we learn that Jesus has extreme ways to help us understand spiritual things that we would never understand any other way.
In all these examples, not once did Jesus (God) ever sin against His own commandments (read 1 Peter 2:21-22), and He never manipulated, controlled, or abused people in any way. To think we know better than Jesus, the perfect Son of God, is ludicrous.
Keeping The Peace in Your Relationships
With all that being said, it’s important that we keep love as the focus in our relationships with people. In a healthy friendship/relationship with a loved one, it’s important that we don’t get wrapped up stupid arguments over things that don’t matter in the long run (read 2 Timothy 2:23-24). While it’s true that there are times we need to speak up about something that we know is wrong (1 Peter 3:15), healthy friendships/relationships rarely have issues that are worth arguing about.
I know people who have decided to stop being friends over a difference of opinion in regards to politics. I know of people who haven’t talked to their former friends in years because of an argument about money. The only people we punish when we want to always be right is ourselves since thinking we’re always right will eventually lead to isolation and loneliness. One of the secrets to lifelong friendships is letting go issues that don’t count for eternity. Letting go of issues doesn’t mean that we lie and pretend to agree with something we don’t actually agree with, but we respect someone else’s difference of opinion while keeping the relationship as the focus.
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I remember reading about Jim Jones, before he started Jonestown, throwing down a Bible and saying the problem is people are paying more attention to the Bible than to him.
Indeed, some differences are trite, and we certainly don't have to obsess on them. Good illustration about what is really important and why.
Other disagreements are not trite, such as the Trinity. I recently had a conversation with a Jehovah's Witness. When she said they don't believe in the Trinity, I disagreed. I generally just keep my distance from Jehovah's Witnesses.
-Jeff