Testimonies
Sometimes while walking a mile with my mom; we tend to engage in conversations which oftentimes pertain to my life, prior to divine transformation. The more she begins to elaborate on my past sinful actions, the more foreign my life back then appears to me. However, as unrecognizable as the woman in her stories is, the truth remains that I chose to be that person at the time. Some of the things my mom expounds on from her memories literally seem unfathomable for me to digest. I have actually told my her that hearing the various characteristics and actions of the person I once was seems as though she is referring to someone else altogether. I do recall broken fragments of my past which coincide with much of the details of her recollections, but it is still difficult to comprehend that I was ever capable of causing so much heartache and drama filled suffering, not only in my own life, but in the lives of many others as well.
I guess my saving grace is knowing that the individual described in her stories was held captive to an unholy spirit during those disgraceful episodes; and that the hand of God reached down to snatch the demonic entity out of my body before it swallowed up my soul. The Bible teaches that God sent Christ to give salvation to believers and non believers alike; but the Gospel clearly states that the main purpose of Jesus was geared toward saving the souls of sinners:
Luke 5:31-32 Jesus answered them, It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. 32 I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.
I must admit that as unfathomable as it is to recount such horrid memories of my old self, I am without any regrets because everything that occurred back then was necessary to achieve the spiritual life which consumes the person I am in the present day. Even though my belief in Christ extends back as far as I can remember, my spiritual walk was at a crossroads which allowed Satan to sometimes take over in the spiritual form of his demons. Throughout the years, especially in my thirties and forties, I became complacent in living a luke warm existence; simply because I had not developed the level of divine understanding and faith that resides within my spirit now, so I would vacillate within the boundaries of hot and cold.
Revelation 3:15-16 I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16 So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth.
It was during my lowest point while living in darkness, consumed by a life of drunkenness, adultery, fornication, pursuing ill gotten gain through excessive gambling, sporadic rages and countless other sins, that God delivered me with His loving grace. God is REAL, but so is the devil who continues to battle against our Heavenly Father until the second coming of Christ. I have learned the hard way how to repent (turning away from sin) and to forgive myself and others.
The devil attacks the children of God by utilizing his demons to manipulate us into a life of sin because he knows that the more we sin and remain in darkness the lesser our chances are to acquire spiritual transformation by the light. Jesus is the light who died for our sins so that we may have eternal salvation; but the choice is ours as to whether or not we receive Him through unwavering faith. I am so humbled and thankful to God for not only allowing me the chance to see the light, but to live in the light. I heed the Word of God and seek to live my life according to scripture. As long as I reside upon this earth, the temptations of sin through the evil forces will forever beckon at my door; but I choose to wear the armor of Christ to fight back, rebuke and to overcome all demonic influences.
Ephesians 6:10-12 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.
Once I let go of my previous degenerative lifestyle and accepted the Hand of God which pulled me out of darkness; my intimate world became a haven of peace, grace, joy, strength, wisdom, divine insight and most importantly, LOVE. The devil is only as powerful as we allow him to be; the true everlasting power solely belongs to our Almighty Creator God who chose to share it with us through His Son, Jesus Christ equipping us to overcome all suffering, pain, temptation, and the dark forces clouding this world.
Luke 10:19 Behold, I have given you authority to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing shall hurt you.
Although we are born into sin, God has provided us with the necessary tools to overcome sin by living with a repentant heart. He has graced us with His divine mercy and forgiveness so that when we stumble and fall, we are presented with an opportunity to get back up and stand in a state righteousness in our daily walk through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. After God delivered me from a continual life of sin; I grew stronger in His Word and embraced the Holy Spirit which has changed the negative desires of my heart. I no longer find pleasure in all the earthly temptations and deceit of the devil because my spirit has been renewed by my faith in our Heavenly Lord and Savior.
1 John 3:8 Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil.
Romans 5:1-5 Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. 3 Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
I pray that each of you who are reading this and possibly struggling with living in darkness instead of righteousness; that the Mighty Hand of God will deliver you from your sinful ways and lead you to seek a life of truth by His Word and the Holy Spirit. I encourage each of you to take inventory of your life to ascertain whatever changes need to occur in order to protect your soul from eternal damnation. Repent and accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior and learn to live in the light which leads to eternal life. Peace, joy, grace and love to all who believe and overcome the darkness of this world.
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This is a powerful testimony. I'm sure it took a lot of courage to write it. I can see so many of my dark moments being used now to glorify God. I never imagined something so wonderful could come out of something so dark, but God is a mighty and caring God as you so aptly demonstrated in your article.
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