The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/24/14
Never would have guessed the ending—what a clever way to keep a little girl out of trouble!
Colorfully written. Loved this phrase: "Gravity stacked his pants". It's the most unusual and comical expression I've ever seen for such a circumstance. Although I half-suspected the ending, it was still an entertaining read. Other than a few missing commas, very well done.
07/26/14
Smiling widely over here. Well done, adorable and fun read.

God bless~
07/27/14
Loved the detail and the humour in this story, although I had to read slowly as the local dialect was unfamiliar to me. Great job!
07/27/14
Hi,
Great job! I liked the local dialect and the way the little girl's note was written.

Does this sentence need to include an "and"? It wasn’t five minutes before the top law-dog arrived, heard the details, put on his specs, read the note. (and read the note)

I was surprised by the ending but really liked it. She has a great imagination.

Blessings
07/27/14
Loved the dialogue and the Barney Fife sort of policeman. Enjoyable with a nice twist ending. Great job.
07/30/14
Your vivid descriptions and westerny dialogue painted a fabulous tale.

Big grins at your finale.

One of my favorites.
Hysterical!
Congratulations for ranking 29th overall! Happy Dance!