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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: Hmph! (03/04/10)
"May I vent to you? Please? It's been a long day. Let me start at the beginning."

********

"Class, listen up. Class? Class?"

My day of subbing had just begun and already was starting on the wrong foot. They wouldn't even listen to me long enough to start their Daily Oral Language assignment. They had been talking non-stop since they had walked through the door, and I had already written out five passes to the nurse's office. I knew not all of them were genuine, but I was a sub. How was I supposed to know? It was a bit early in the day for this method, and I hated punishing the whole class for just a few who were causing trouble, but I was desperate.

"Okay. That's it. Five minutes off of recess," I said, making a slash mark on the board.

That quieted them. For about five seconds. Then it started again. "Am I going to have to take off more time?" I asked. No change.

Bribery. That normally works. "If you make it until music without talking, you can earn your five minutes of recess back." Finally, I saw twenty sets of eyes looking up at me.

"Thank you. Let's continue with the lesson."

I made it to music, and they even earned their five minutes of recess back. I patted myself on the back for a job well done. However, after music, they were back to their old tricks. Talking, turning around in their chairs, putting their feet on the desk... you name it.

Okay. Time for Action Plan C – Bribery Part 2. Once again, it was a bit early in the day for this method. But sometime you've got to do what you've got to do. "I have a surprise for you at the end of the day if you're good. And I'll make sure to leave your teacher a good note," Well, mostly good, I thought to myself.

This time they made it to lunch with minimal disruptions and only three more passes to the nurse's office, although at least one of those was genuine. I have the proof sitting in the trashcan. And my shoes.

Then, after lunch, they were even worse than before. "Class, listen to me. Please listen to me. Remember the surprise I have for you at the end of the day."

"What is it?" one child asked.

"You'll have to wait to find out. That's why it's a surprise," I said. The truth was, I wasn't even sure what it was. Maybe the teacher had a candy stash somewhere. I'd pay her back. Or maybe I had twenty quarters in my wallet.

Unfortunately, they didn't seem to hear my reminder.

Well... fine then, I thought, mentally crossing my arms and pouting. I couldn't let them see any outwards signs of defeat. If they aren't going to listen to me, maybe I'll talk to someone who will.

Without a word to the students, I walked to the side of the room and turned to the wall. "Wall," I said, loud enough to be heard by the children, "These students won't listen to me. But maybe you will." I heard the talking stop, but I didn't want to turn around quite yet. "Mr. Wall, would you please get out your science book and turn to page 251? I want to teach you about light. And if you listen quietly and can answer the review questions after we read, I have a really cool experiment to show you."

I finally dared to turn around. Before me, nineteen students (remember the shoe incident?) sat before me with their science books open. My footsteps echoed in the room as I walked to the front. Finally. I had them in the palm of my hand. Oh sure, they'd talk about the substitute who talked to the wall. But I didn't care.

At the end of the day, I handed nineteen students a quarter. Am I a softie? Perhaps. But four dollars and seventy-five cents is a small price to pay for my sanity. And that whole talking to a wall incident? Let's pretend that never even happened. Good night, Mr. Desk Chair."
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This article has been read 1576 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
R Quist
03/13/10
I enjoyed this. Very good dialogue and description -- brought me into feeling like I was with the teacher in her class, and was very well done. One VERY minor thing I personally missed as a reader, was some sort of clue as to the age of the teacher's students near the top, but it works without knowing that also. It's just something I personally wanted to know about halfway through the story and started re-reading up near the beginning to try and figure it out. Once you started mentioning a quarter as a reward, that defined them as pretty young though, so that helped clear it up once I got that far.
Jackie Wilson
03/14/10
This was a fun look at the difficulties faced by a sub. I liked her creativity !
Lyn Churchyard
03/15/10
Having two adult children who are grade school teachers, I can relate to this. She had a very novel way of getting their attention. It won't work again though... not with those kids. Good stuff Ali, I enjoyed reading this. Well done.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
03/15/10
I loved the talking to the wall part. I burst out laughing as I pictured this scene. good job.
Barbara Culler 
03/15/10
I liked the line about proof in the wastebasket and her shoe! Classic!
The teacher was brilliant to think of talking to the wall-great story!
Bryan Ridenour
03/15/10
As a former sub, I can really relate. Loved the talking to the wall and closing desk chair remark. Well done!
AnneRene' Capp
03/15/10
Liked your very realistic diaglogue and you had me feeling like I was the teacher. Especially like you saying Good Night to Mr. Desk Chair!
Connie Dixon
03/15/10
Exactly why I don't sub. You had some very creative ideas however. Good job!
Pamela Kliewer 
03/16/10
Great humor in this piece. I liked it... I have a fogged head due to a cold so had to reread the part about the trash can and the shoes... but then I got it! :D
Lisha Hunnicutt
03/17/10
Great story and very realistic to what a sub goes through. I am an 18 year veteran elementary teacher and this scene is all to common in grade school classrooms with subs and with student teachers. You really captured it well! Great job!
Beth LaBuff 
03/18/10
I enjoyed the whole day. :) Love the "talking to Mr. Wall" and other inanimate objects.. :) Well done!!