The Official Writing Challenge
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Ooooh! I LOVE this POV! It's so fresh and different, especially to see them as preteens and with the usual playing tag, etc. It is so incredibly real-what a neat job with descriptions and characters. I really enjoyed it! ^_^
What a delightful read of these two cousins. I was going to try this one, but unlike you could not think of a way to do it. Glad you did this!
I've often wondered if Jesus and John had a relationship before the Baptism... what a FUN way to imagine it. Awesome writing!!
This is one of my favorites--so creatively written--leaving me with so much to think about.
06/01/08
SOOOO creative, and I love your ending with a question. Well done!
06/01/08
Ohh - SO creative! Love this POV, and everything else about this piece! Wonderful!
This was entertaining. I love reading what *might* have happened along with our familiar Bible stories. Very well done.
Such a unique take on two very special cousins! Wonderfully refreshing and creative POV. Nice work. Blessings, Cheri
06/02/08
This is a unique perspective on the relationship between Jesus and John. I enjoyed this.
06/02/08
An interesting take on what we can only imagine. I liked the comradery between them. I think I would have quoted the exact words, but you have shown the human side of Jesus...the part that laughed and played like any other boy.
Well done.
An amazingly different take on the topic. I would never have thought of this one. You have a wild imagination some times Laury. This has been very well written and I love the "not quite sure" feeling from John. Well done Laury!
06/02/08
Wow! There is a lot of depth in this. I like the fact that John ate locust(the prophecy aspect) and then the end with the whole matter of trust that relates back to the first part of your story. Excellent work on this.
06/02/08
I like to think about our ancestors in the Lord...and this one really brings home the relationship Jesus might have had with his beloved cousin. It's powerful to realize that the people of Bible days lived, laughed, hurt, cried and loved others the way we do. Wonderful story!
This is a very creative and fun way of looking at the early years of Jesus and John the Baptist.

I too wrote about these two cousins, but I wrote about the later years. It was great getting to see a take on the younger years, and you did a wonderful job portraying how it might have been.
06/04/08
I love that you chose to portray this relationship in their youth--great POV.

I had a bit of a problem with the obviously American idioms and speech patterns. I'm beginning to think this is just an issue with me, though, as it's very popular on this site! I'll have to think about it for a bit.

Regardless of my weirdness, this is very well-written, and a fun read.
You worked hard on this and it shows. So many small-known details mixed with possibilities.

I was thrown off the the word jar and the word house-they seemed too modern, but maybe it is just me.

This was fun and engaging read.