The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
04/12/13
I really enjoyed your story. Cynthia came up trumps after all. Great humour and no doubt, some realism. Well done.
This is a cute story. You did a nice job of going from resentment to acceptance in only 750 words. The ending didn't feel forced at all which isn't always easy in limited words.

I did wonder about a couple of things. At first he couldn't remember the name of Swan Lake, but then he did say it. I know the time before was before the show, then he said it during the show, which might have worked better if told in present tense instead of past. I also wonder if a boy who was really into boy things would reference Parent Trap. It's possible, that he watched it with Mom, but it did make me hesitate just a bit. Overall though, I really think you did a nice job. I like the characters and the scene in the pool was a divine description. I almost could feel the water splashing off the screen. Nicely done.
04/14/13
Oh, I really enjoyed this. Especially the way it ended up. Very nice story and made me smile. Great job.
04/14/13
Good for Cynthia. She gave that young Mitch his comeuppance. You did a superb job with Cynthia's character in so few words. Great writing.
04/15/13
You held my attention with this story. It was an accurate portrayal of a child adjusting to the situation you developed with the school year being with mom and the summer with dad.

Great job on developing the characters. I also wondered about the Parent Trap reference for a boy.

04/16/13
I really enjoyed your story and the way the villain-ess became a potential ally. Great fun with the timeless lesson not to judge a book by it cover.
This is FUN! Funny and delightful - I will chuckle over this for a long time.
04/16/13
Great first line! It caught my attention and made me want to find out what on earth she'd done! The last line was a perfect partner to it! A change of mind was definitely taking place here! :) Your description of what happened at the pool was well-done and made me smile. Good job!
04/16/13
Loved this, from beginning to end! Mitch certainly learned his lesson, but you did a great job with the ending. I would agree the reference to The Parent Trap is a little different coming from a boy, but I have two boys and they both have watched that movie dozens of times (the original and the newer version). Good job!
04/18/13
Loved the first line, it pulled me in immediately! The rest was icing on the cake...great job.

God bless~
Congrats on your EC, Christina! Great writing, girl
Ohhhhhh! Glorious. A well-deserved win!
04/18/13
Hearty CONGRATULATIONS on your E.C. win for this amusing story with its good message! WAY TO WRITE!!
04/18/13
Great character development with so few words! Fantastic! Congrats on your EC placement! #3 overall!!!!
A hearty congrats to you Christina on your "spin of the Parent Trap" and your second place win! God Bless.
04/18/13
Very entertaining. Congrats on winning 3rd!
04/18/13
Congratulations, Stina!
04/18/13
Congratulations Christina! Beautifully written! God bless!
04/19/13
I completely enjoyed the unexpected ending. I'm still smiling. Super congrats on your Editor's Choice award.
Congratulations!
I enjoyed this story for a couple reasons. First, it was just plain fun to read. Second, it is a fairly accurate description of the way a kid feels when his or her dad includes his new girlfriend in their special summer visits. It brought back memories I hadn't thought about in years. Thank goodness for happy endings. Congratulations on your EC.