The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
04/16/09
Great story—emotional, with just the right amount of conflict, and a super surprise at the end.
04/16/09
Nice realism, I was drawn into the moment.
Your story shows well the love in the home, and the husband's fear, as well as his determination. I felt like I was sitting in the kitchen with them. Good writing.
04/19/09
I love the ending of this, and the wonderful cross-cultural relationship, and...well, just everything. This is gorgeous!
I love this! I love seeing the Hispanic culture and the authentic relationship. Very real emotions. Nice!
04/19/09
Oh, life is just like that sometimes, isn't it? I'm quite sure that this loving couple will "find a way"! A beautiful written vignette... I loved it!
04/19/09
The love between the couple really came through in your writing. Beautiful.
04/19/09
I was totally drawn into your characters and this snapshot of their life. Little by little, you introduced details of the woman, and by the end I was in love with her. Aces!
I love the relationship you've portrayed between this husband and wife. Both characters came to life for me. Somehow I know they will make it.
04/20/09
The husband is this story is trying to fulfill his role as head of the household. You can feel the burden he is feeling, but also you can see the wife will be a great supporter of him. You did a great job without getting over emotional.
04/21/09
This was very good. I could see and feel the love they shared. I suspect she was as concerned about telling him her news as he was dreading telling her.
04/22/09
What a sweet story that warms the heart. These two were made for each other. Good job!
04/22/09
This is awesome. I love your subtle references to hot and cold. Your words are powerful and real. Good job.
04/22/09
I really liked the voice of the MC, the way he looked at his wife, the relationship they had. You very cleverly and nicely weaved the topic throughout - nice job.
04/22/09
I love the interaction between the husband and wife. Very nicely written.
What a tender and sweet story, Loved it from beginning to end.
04/22/09
Lovely story with an ending that took me totally by surprise. I had to re-read it to see if I could pick up any nervousness in Sylvia as I wondered who was carrying the bigger bomb shell. She seemed totally in control though, a strong woman indeed!