Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: Concentration (07/24/08)

TITLE: Don't Concentrate, Please
By Gerald Shuler
07/31/08


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 SEND ARTICLE TO A FRIEND
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

Here's something simple,
done with ease,
with no forethought
but to appease.
Please, as you read this
Understand
There is no message;
No demand.
Don't concentrate
For all you're worth
Or look for clues
you must unearth.
If you find depth
within this poem
it stems from you,
and you alone.
So why write words
so weak and stale?
'cause we all need
Time to exhale.
Our busy lives,
so pressure prone,
leaves us no time
to see what's grown
within ourselves.
We never notice
little things
that made an impact
never seen
until we take
the time to look
a little deeper...
then we get shook.
When did the words
we write for all
become offensive?
When did the wall
get built between
what we meant to say
and what was seen?
The way of truth,
much like a seed,
will never grow
unless you feed
with ugly things,
like (ugh) manure.
but that is how
we all mature.
Then when we've seen
the filth we're in,
and once we realize
it's sin,
we can finally
concentrate
on what to do;
we dare not wait.
Concentrate
on what was said
when Jesus said
"I am the Bread."
He also said
"I am the way."
We all need time
to understand
our busy lives
can never stand
unless we hold tight
to Jesus' hand.

If you read this
to the very end
then concentrate
on where you've been.
Slow down at least
enough to see
your need for Christ...
He'll set you free.


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 879 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Yvonne Blake 08/02/08
Interesting... The short lines were a little hard to read.
Lynda Schultz 08/04/08
Just like kids—when you tell us not to do something, we are sure to it. I concentrated. Good stuff.
Darlene Casino 08/06/08
I do not see this as shallow, but as creative and worth reading. Simplicity is often the most direct way to communicate truth.
Loren T. Lowery08/06/08
Truths can be found in some of the most unassuming ways - this was one of them. Good stuff!
Glynis Becker 08/06/08
Creative and worth reading--not shallow at all!
Sharlyn Guthrie08/06/08
Wow! Guess I'm pretty deep after all :)

I found some exellent lines and, yes, meaning, in your poem. Nice job. Thanks for sharing it with us.
Sharlyn Guthrie08/06/08
Wow! Guess I'm pretty deep after all :)

I found some exellent lines and, yes, meaning, in your poem. Nice job. Thanks for sharing it with us.
Karen Wilber 08/06/08
There's more depth in this poem than you realize. It's simple, but there's plenty of things in here to consider.

"When did the wall
get built between
what we meant to say
and what was seen?"

So you thought your poem was a bit shallow? Kind of ironic, huh? ;-)
Joshua Janoski08/07/08
The format was hard to read, but that is what I think makes it awesome. The whole point was to force the reader to concentrate hard on the words, and the format forces hard concentration.

Also, you will find some great thoughts mixed in the long stream of words if you did actually take the time to "concentrate" and read them.

Gerald, you are a very clever man!