The Official Writing Challenge
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05/09/08
Young love. SOmething that hasn't really changed over the centuries, has it? Well written, dreamy feeling.
The brother/sister banter is just right in this well done adaptation of a Bible story.
So fun to ponder...how things are different now, and yet not so different at all! Thank you for taking us there. I enjoyed imagining the sibling relationship. This makes me think beyond the Bible, between the lines, challenging me to think deeper in my time in the Word. Well done.
05/12/08
Oh I love this. You need to start writing and stop researching for a while, my friend! Wow! Love this!
I love reading behind the scenes Bible stories. This one is SO well told. Your MC giving her brother a playful punch on the shoulder was just the right touch. Big thumbs up.
You bring this family and their story to life! I enjoy your insight and perspective, as well as the imagined brother/sister relationship. I look forward to reading more of your stories about Michal. What a great project!
05/12/08
I love that you're re-introducing us to Michal--her story just isn't as well-known as some, and she's a fascinating character.

This is extremely well-written, with engaging characters, and leaves me wanting more.

My only problem is a bit of cognitive dissonance with their modern idioms. That's purely personal preference, but something that you might want to think through for your larger piece.
For larger work, I'd like more of a sense of the palace.
Her status as princess made know to us earlier by interraction with a servant perhaps,

Not a thing wrong with this as it is though.

I will be interesting to see how the frienship between David and Jonathan grows.

Well worth pursuing!
05/12/08
It makes me stop and think about the Biblical characters we're so familiar with, when I read characterization like this. They really were alive and living-just like us. I love this beginning of the story. Caught my attention and held it through to the end!
05/12/08
You brought all three of these characters to life in a great way. I loved it and can't wait to read more! When Michal refers to Saul as 'Dad' it surprised me, the term, but I loved the interaction between the brother and sister and I could see it so clearly. I hope there's more SOON!! Hugs my friend! :D
05/12/08
Beautiful! I can't wait for the whole book.
Oooh goody, another story about Michal. You doing such a lovely job with this 'series' Jo. Hope we're going to see some more, and not have to wait for the book (or movie). Great job as always.
05/12/08
I'm getting very testy and IMpatient for my signed copy. Love it.
05/13/08
I loved this glimpse into the life of Michal and Jonathan. I appreciated the forshadowing with Jonathan's "I have a feeling David will do much for Israel," and after reading your story, I appreciate what your title implies. I really like this.
I enjoyed this little slice of Biblical history and your presentation in a modern way.
If this is a preview of the bigger work, then we are all in for a real treat. If anyone is good at taking Bible stories and creatively expanding upon them, it is you, Joanne. Loved every single line! :)
05/14/08
We tend to think more about the friendship between David and Jonathan, and of the mistake Michal ends up making. But this is a wonderful view of Michal's earlier years before she becomes so cynical.
05/14/08
You're so good! What am I gonna do with you? Except sit back and savor each morsel as though I might never have another like it again. Put me down for 2 copies. I like to read 2 books at a time, and I'd like them both to be yours! **grin**
What can I say that hasn't been said? It's really beautiful to be able to bring Bible characters to life, and you've certainly accomplished that. Loved it.
This was delightful and well-written. I really enjoyed it.
05/14/08
Oh I do like it! Michal seems so delightful and girlish here, as if I could've known her myself. You made her come alive here, though I wished for a tad more-feeling-from her. Something to show that she was really into this. I loved the interaction between her and Jonathan. Great job! ^_^
I always enjoy your retelling of Bible stories. You give the characters so much personality.
So real and believable, all the way from the setting to the feelings made evident in the wonderful dialogue. You have a great knace for engaging the reader and re-telling Bible history.
It's hard for me to ever comment on your stories because they are so good, but, this one surprised me. You've been moaning about not writing to compete, stretching, etc. You can't write anything that isn't superb, can you :) Excellent.
05/14/08
27 gold boxes must mean you did it right. I think you have a winning combination of style and story. I look forward to the book.
I really do love the way you brind Bible characters to life my friend. Another well written story that pulled me in from the first sentence and held me to the end.
05/16/08
A chapter from your novel, maybe? ;-) Excellent, loved it!