And The Winner Is?
“Can we have a dog mom, please. Every kid in the neighbourhood has a dog.” Josh stood in the middle of the kitchen floor, his twelve year old face squeezed into a look of pleading. They’d had this conversation before, many times before. Only this time his mother was prepared with a different response.
“Okay,” she said. “Here’s the deal. You have a choice. Either we can get a dog, and give up your father, or keep your father, and not get a dog.” Ginny pulled a glass from the dishwasher, polishing at a stubborn spot that wouldn’t go away.
“Do I hear a hesitation?” Josh’s dad came into the kitchen, a big smile on his face. “I just heard the ultimatum. What’s it gonna be Josh? Oh, did I mention I had passes for the hockey game tonight?”
With one look at the smiles on both their faces, Josh’s frustration got even bigger. “Funny guys, real funny.” Then he joined the game, determined to beat them at it.
“Okay then,” he said, mustering up all the wisdom he could. “Let’s look at this way. Mom, for every reason you give me to keep dad, I’ll match you with a reason we should get the dog.”
Ginny dropped the glass on the floor, smashing shards around her feet. Josh’s dad looked at his son wrestling between a moment of pride at the sudden flash of maturity, and disbelief, at the proposition.
“You’re on,” Ginny said. “You go first, and I’ll match you.” Josh’s father sat down at the table, a coffee in hand, and waited.
“Okay guys,” the young boy came up with his first plus for the pup. “He would be a great watch dog, and protect the house and the neighbourhood and everything.” His voice grew in exuberance.
“Well,” Ginny said. “I watched your father tackle a man twice his size when we were dating. Sure, it was because he thought this guy was hitting on me, but hey, there’s strong protection potential there. So one score for both.”
Josh continued, pointing a finger in the air at this one. “We could teach this dog with one word commands to do things for us. With dad, you gotta tell him over and over. Taking out the garbage and that kinda stuff.” Josh’s father shifted in his chair a bit, and took a big gulp of coffee.
“Okay,” Ginny scratched the side of her head, and began with, “But your father does do a few things without asking. Not many, but enough to make keeping him here worthwhile.”
Josh walked around in a small circle, then stopped and with a big smile said, “But a puppy would make you get out and exercise, you know, walking him and stuff. You know how you complain dad never gets out there with you in the mornings and you have to get yourself going. Dogs love walks.” Josh felt a big point for this one.
“True,” Ginny’s voice started to waiver. Josh’s father cleared his throat in an apologetic gesture. “True, but I don’t have to keep him on a leash when I am out there. No tugging on a chain, and he’s relatively noiseless, so it’s an easier walk.”
“Okay, one final one then.” Josh was gearing up for the crowning reason to trade his father in for a pup. “He’s a whole lot cheaper to feed.” With that, Josh’s father patted his raising belly and got up from the table. “Let me know the outcome,” he said, sucking in his stomach, grabbing the garbage to take outside and then “When this is finished, let’s go for a jog.” He said to Ginny. “By the way, I’ll keep you safe out there when we do go.” He left the two to his fate.
“Well Josh,” his mother said, patting her son on the shoulder. “You have some pretty good arguments. But I think the best reason to keep your dad, is because we know what we get with him. No surprises. And he’s still trainable. I say we go with the tried and true for now.”
With that, she grabbed her running shoes, yelling down the hall. “Your shoes are in the closet. Grab them and let’s go. I think you’re safe for another couple of weeks at least. The puppy lost, for now anyway.”
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