Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Commitment (01/05/12)
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TITLE: The Alter Call | Previous Challenge Entry
By harvestgal Ndaguba
01/12/12 -
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I can't. I want to, but I can't. I won't be a hypocrite. I'd rather be true and live in my sin, than live a false life or give Mom some false hope that I've really changed.
“Remember the blood that was shed for you. He loves you. He doesn't want anyone to go to hell.”
Hell? I ain't going to no hell. Well... maybe I am if I don't change my ways. Still, they're just using scare tactics. If it weren't that I came to church for Mom's birthday, I'd get up and walk right out of here.
“I can feel the Lord calling people right now. Someone is resisting God and you know who you are.”
Can they hear my heart beating. My underarms stink. I gotta get out of here.
“Come! Make your life right with God. He loves you. He has a better purpose for your life than what you've planned for yourself.”
Why am I crying. People will think I'm reacting to the message. I'll rub my eyes and act sleepy. Okay, don't panic. You can make it through this. I gotta pee. I can't go up, I'd probably wet myself.
“I'm gonna wait, cause I sense someone struggling with God right now.”
Can't he just end this stupid alter call and let us go home. Why did I commit to come to church for Mom's birthday anyway, of all places. I'm not going up. I won't change anyway. I know me, I'll just go back to my old ways. I don't have the discipline to change. My heart wants to do right, but I'm weak. And what of all my friends. Just leave them behind. Then who'll be there for me. Mom? She's not enough. I need friends.
“People the world has nothing for you. All the things you are holding on to are just like baits to draw you away from the awesome life God has for you. Don't be Satan's fool. Come to the one who really loves you.”
I ain't nobody's fool. I just can't change. The drugs, the parties, Mark. Well... Mark ain't really worth holding on to. He's just like all the other guys. I can't believe what he did to me Friday night. I'm tired of this life. People just use and abuse you. No one really cares. I'd change if I could. I'm just weak. I guess I am a fool.
“Remember the woman at the Well. She'd gone from one man to another looking for someone who'd satisfy the longing in her heart, but she never found it. Jesus didn't come to condemn her. He revealed Himself to her. He had the living Water she'd been searching for. Jesus has what you are longing for."
I don't wanna be a hypocrite. God, you know me. I wanna change but I can't. I believe you have what I need. I just don't wanna let you down. I let so many people down in the past. Why would you want someone like me.
“Folks, you can't change yourself. If you could change yourself, you wouldn't need a Savior. No one could keep the law. We've all fallen short. That's why Jesus came. He fulfilled the law on our behalf. He's the one who changes you.”
There's nothing this world has for me. What is my life anyway. I've made a mess of things. God if you can change me, I think I'm ready. I'm just scared, plus I stink and I need to pee.
“Now is the time. If God is convicting your heart, just come. Don't worry about what people think. Just come. Christ gave his life for you, now give Him yours. Come make things right.”
Alright, I'm going up. Stinky and all, I'm going up, even if I wet myself. I'm giving you me... all of me.
“Amen Sister, I'm glad you came. You were worth waiting for. Is there anyone else? We are waiting...”
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