Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Our Mutual Friend (not about the book) (09/15/11)
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TITLE: The Other Son | Previous Challenge Entry
By Leola Ogle
09/20/11 -
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ADD TO MY FAVORITES
His cries piercing the air as my mother and sisters look on
My eyes dart to him, newborn, cradled in my mother’s arms
Do you want to hold him? the nurse asks
I shake my head and turn my eyes
Not willing to see my mother’s tears, to feel responsible for them
While I lay on the delivery table, she walks in
Our mutual friend, she who has arranged it all
Before she holds him, she kisses my cheek, then asks for a telephone
I’m holding your baby, a beautiful boy, she says to her
Tears gather in my eyes, I blink them away
They come the next day to see, to touch, to hold
They are now mommy and daddy, my gift bestowed
The curtain is drawn, I on one side, they on the other
I hear their coos, their laughter, their muffled sobs
I detach myself from their emotions, my emotions
A better life I give him, my family doesn’t understand
They want me to feel their hurt, their loss
It angers me but makes me sad, my life, my choice, I say
Time passes, months, years, I hold other babies, another son, daughters
I think of him, the other son, but not with sadness or regret
Abstractly - as though a movie I’ve seen or a book I’ve read
I hear reports, see pictures through our mutual friend
My mother’s friend, really, she who arranged it
They -friends who wanted, needed, prayed for a baby
We - friends who had a baby to give
Drawn together by our mutual friend
Full of love and compassion for both sides
More years pass, I’m lost, angry, aimless, addicted
Then I change, I get it together, my life that is
My children are growing, I see things differently
Becoming a grandmother, I understand now my mother’s pain
I think of him, the other son, differently now, with longing
No longer a baby, whom I’ve only seen from a distance or in pictures
Our mutual friend, she who arranged it, tried to arrange a meeting
But he would not because they would not
The mommy and daddy, they hold a tight reign
Afraid to let go, to lose him, to share him, although he is grown now
Our mutual friend hugs me, I’m sorry, she says
I try to understand, I’m no threat to them, to their parenthood
He has always been their son, not mine, my gift bestowed
Why make him feel guilty just to meet me
It’s his life though, his choice, he could choose if he really wanted
I talk with our mutual friend, she shrugs, pain mirrored in her eyes
So I wait and wonder and pray, so much to say to him
To tell him why, though perhaps he doesn’t care why
Now it is I who longs for a gift only he can bestow
**Based on actual events
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