The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
07/13/06
Wow! This is as good as it gets. Very well done. (tho you may want to write "molten 'Lava' not larva." Its the difference between bugs and burnts.)
I like your galloping rhythm. Very effective! The message is powerfully expressed.
07/13/06
Fast paced and to the point. I didn't expect the ending. (didn't read ahead to the scripture)
This is a great read. Wonderful job.
07/15/06
Horse, ship, and the untamable tongue. Nice flow and rhythm. Good job.
07/17/06
A horse may bear a rider or a stubborn ship be swung,
A thousand creatures have been quelled, but who can tame the tongue?

Yeah, buddy!! Ummmm . . .sorry, I'll try to be more professional there. Very true indeed!!! Very well written! hmmmmm . . . I wonder who . . . guess I'll just have to wait!
Helen, discovering your brilliant poetic streak is like finding gold buried in my back yard! This piece is so rich and rewarding to read. Magnificent imagery. Tight, driving rhythm and abundant assonance and alliteration. This would be a joy to read aloud. You led masterfully into the last line, "Who can tame the tongue?" Bravo!
07/17/06
Wow! Just wow! My favorite by far of entries I've read this week.
07/17/06
excellent job! I felt like I could hear the horse's hoof beats. Chuckled at your larva too. LOL
07/18/06
No, guys, no - I meant burnt bugs... honest ;)
07/18/06
Strangely--I believe her!!! Molten larvae. Hmmmm . . .Interesting concept!
07/18/06
This is destined to be a CLASSIC. For now, it goes into my "favorites."
07/19/06
Great! Who can tame the tongue ... what a powerfully descriptive piece about the "small restless evil, full of deadly poison". (James 3:8) Wonderfully done! :)